I Don’t Have Sex
Doctor: Is there any chance you might be pregnant?
Me: No.
Doctor: What form of birth control are you using?
Me: None
Doctor: Oh, Okay, so you’re not sexually active.
Doctor: Is there any chance you might be pregnant?
Me: No.
Doctor: What form of birth control are you using?
Me: None
Doctor: Oh, Okay, so you’re not sexually active.
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This reminded me of something…
In court:
Lawyer: Are you sexually active?
Witness: No, I just lie there.
Damn! Jen stole my line! I’m the stand-up comic; joke/line stealing is supposed to be MY bailiwick.
Note to self:
Psychiatrist [me]; Are you sexually active
Patient: No
Psychiatrist [me]: Well, get out there and FUCK. Sheesh.
Patient: Okay, but are you still going to bill me for a full hour?