From San Francisco to Oklahoma City to New York City to Houston we celebrate pride 2009.  Everyone have a safe weekend and make sure you drink the liquors that advertise in our parades and support our community whether it be a beer or a vodka.  Remember the banks and other organizations and busineses that take part in the gay pride festivals and parades and support them!!  Support your drag queens and bartenders too haha!

Steve Ruda told the newspaper Thursday that Jackson was not breathing when Los Angeles Fire Department paramedics responded to a call at his Los Angeles home about 12:30 p.m.

The paramedics performed CPR and took him to UCLA Medical Center, told the paper.

Sordid Lives the TV show had the hottest of guys being Jason and his singing men chorus auditions when it broke to the Hollywood scene he was engaged in but then went back to Texas life to show his family and friends there.  Oh, and there is Leslie Jordon who plays Loretta Lynn or Brother Boy as they called him… the guy from Will and Grace.

The other great characters were Noleta Nethercott, Peggy Ingram (Rue McClanahan, Golden Girls), and I think my favorite was Beth Grant or Sissy Hickey.  I just loved Sissy’s bee-hive-ish hair.  But there was also the singing delight Bitsy Mae who we all know as Olivia Newton-John.  And we cannot forgot LaVonda and then there is Dr. Eve the doc trying to change the Sexual Preferences of Brother Boy.

So this about shows you a sum of some of the big name stars in this show not including the terriffic Del Shores who put all of this together.  But what is the catch? LOGO is claiming they will not bring back the show because of its costs blamed on the bad economy.  It may be too late to save the show from LOGO  carrying it but we could try.  There is currently a petition going on over at the petition site and a facebook page setup to save the show.

Here are some other options:
Email LOGO directly at- www.logoonline.com/about/contact.jhtml

Oh and while you are at it let’s make a petition for someone to bring back Queer As Folk.  That is my all time favorite show and I think its high time to have a revamped QAF every sunday night.  Both shows need to come back but Sordid Lives can be easier to bring back since its on a roll right now as a popular show and just need some action from us all.

Del Shores the writer of Sordid Lives wrote on his facebook demanding that GLAAD take action and they finally did.  It is a sad situation when the gay community has to face off against each other because we are supposed to be a fabulous loving family.  Perez Hilton should apoligize to the entire gay community for his actions even though he was assulted.  The assult and violence brought on from Will.I.Am and Fergie’s band manager should be punished as well.  Violence is never the answer but words such as F-words should not be used either.

The TMZ video of this made my stomach hurt and I was shaking in disapointment that someone in our community would embarass us like this.  It is hard to stand by him but I think he will in time apoligize and clean things up… we should give him a chance to do better and all quit hating each other.  Hate and violence are what the religoius extremists do to each other and we certainly do not want to be one of those losers.

Del Shores (whom is also married to actor Jason Dottley) has also been commenting about the Dustin Lance Black pictures that were posted on Perez Hilton’s site and how that hurt the gay community.  Keep in mind this was only a week or so ago so there is even more bitterness towards Perez.  Although I will have to give Hilton credit that he took down the nude pics of Dustin Lance Black of Milk.

On a better note, Lady Gaga was amazing and sexy as can be gyrating like a hot stripper at the Much Music Awards.  Whether she is a man or a woman she is the hottest thing on the planet.  Her flaming boobs made Britney and the MTV Awards look like a Disney reject movie.  We love you Gaga and can’t wait to see what you do next.

I see if this “explodes” into something big it will be because people are jealous that the Oscar winning Milk writer is so hot in this video.  Hotter than most of the stars that are really supposed to be doing these types of videos.  I admit i will be the first to buy this video!

Of course we all know Dustin lance is gay but did we know he had sex too?  OMG really? haha.  People goto the bathroom as well.  This whole thing could end up being as silly as Adam Lambert coming out as Gay.   I just wonder how these things get “leaked” out or does Dustin Lance want us to know how big his pee pee is… Photo courtesy of Perez Hilton.com.

Dinah Shore Week in Palm Springs, California is the largest lesbian event in the country. Held in the spring (the 2010 dates are March 31 to April 4), Dinah Shore Week includes entertainment planned and organized by the well known L.A based GirlBar, pool parties, and plenty of time to socialize. Dinah Shore Week 2009 boasted an impressive line up of performers, including Macy Gray, Kat Deluna, Julie Goldman, and the Cliks. Reservations fill up quickly, so book by December if you want to stay in the Wyndham Hotel or Hotel Zoso.

Another major lesbian event each year is the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival. While controversy has surrounded the festival, it remains a popular destination for any woman looking to share and experience  a space designed just for her. The festival features intensive workshops of all sorts, performances, and a time to share in a unique space and experience. Moms should note that families with male children 5 and over will need to camp in Brother Sun and use the childcare available there as boys over 4 are not welcome on the festival grounds. This year’s Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival will take place from August 4th to 9th. Visit michfest.com for more information.

Gay Days Orlando has become a popular destination for both single and partnered members of the LGBTQ community. During this week, a number of events designated for Girls at Gay Days occur as well, making it a popular lesbian event destination. You can also take advantage of Gay Day Disney during this event. Comedians, concerts and plenty of dancing await lesbians of all ages at Girls at Gay Days. See girlsatgaydays.com for schedules for this year’s June party.

While not specifically a lesbian oriented event, if you are more concerned with the arts than with a party, consider making Homo A Go Go your event destination. This gay and lesbian oriented arts festival includes music, art, film, performance art and activism from August 13 to August 16, 2009 in San Francisco, California.

Top 5 Lesbian Clubs in the U.S.

There are two specific types of life insurance. The first is universal life. This combines both a death benefit and a savings and investment account. The cash value may be withdrawn if desired. Monthly premiums will be the same throughout life; however, a higher percentage of the premium will go into savings while young than when older.  Term life is more common today, and is what we typically refer to when we talk about life insurance.  Premiums are lower when young and higher as age and risk of death increases. Cash value plans do offer some tax advantages over term life; but term life plans are ideal for most people.

I’m not a big Amerian Idol fan.  I only watched this season for Kris Allen and Adam Lambert and I liked the chick with the tattoos and Matt Giraud.  This season was by far the best season ever of Idol.  But it really was Adam Lambert who made American Idol exciting this year it would have been a boring show without him.  Danny Pokey Gokey was nothing more than a Karoke cruise ship singer who seemed like a nice guy but him and some of the others really had no business being in the top 10.

America eagerly awaited for Adam Lambert’s next creative showing each week which normally outdid the others and outdid himself.  It was the growing talent he had which we all desire on one of these reality shows and we all knew in our hearts he should have won but had that dark feeling that he probably will not win because most of America is still too set in their ways.  It came down to what Suze Orman predicted on twitter:  Suze Orman tweeted that Kris Allen would get Danny Gokeys votes and Adam will lose.  She was right.  Although what is a finance lady doing talking about American Idol– haha no wonder were in a recession lol.  OK, love you Suze.  And by the way Suze was for Adam.

Not only was the gay communities biggest hero Suze Orman for Adam but Katy Perry went out of her way to show her support.  Katy Perry came on Idol and flashed an Elvis outfit with Adam Lambert embrodered on the back.   Katy was performing her new Vegas song which will be a big hit in gay clubs this Summer I can assure you that!  Such good timing since Vegas pride is going on while she rolls out her Vegas song!

Simon was also behind Adam to win Idol.   He did not look too happy when the winner was announced.  Maybe it was the vote against gays or the momentum the religious right has built up from Miss California’s hate against us.  Maybe it was just the fact that Kris Allen is cute as a button and acted so gay friendly that gays even voted for him.  In the end, Adam had the better voice and could out sing Kris but they were really two different types of performers.  So the right thing to do should have been for Kris to say hey this is a tie. I am giving my award to both of us.

The gays already lost with Clay Aiken losing to Ruben Studdard.   There is no way in hell Ruben was better than Clay Aiken at that point anyway.  Clay Aiken was clean cut though and never had the creative energy we see with Adam Lambert.

It is no surprise that a gay got that far in any competition.  I mean if you really think Benji from So You Think You Can Dance is straight or Travis for that matter then think again. Look at most of Hollywood and you will see lots of gays in the closet.  The sad thing is that they want us to put on an act for them 100% of the time and live our lives for them.  If gay marriage does become legal I will not be living my life for the religious right people to live how they think I should live.  I will still be my creative, innovative, ambitious, fun, passionate self and I hope everyone else does too.  So don’t go closing down the nightclubs I will be out to dance!

As for the rest of the Idol show it was mostly great.  Rod Stewart scared me a few times I thought he was going to fall over with his drunken walk.  What was the deal with Fergie and the black eyed peas they seemed to cut away from that performance with the Idol logo and some type of time delay as if something was said after she sung the word “staggered”.  Was she predicting Rod Stewart staggering around?  The time delay part was strange or it was a major technical error.

It was great to see Cyndi lauper perform although I would have loved to her one of her newer songs that were big hits in our community last year.  My top moments of the night were Adam Lambert singing with KISS, Queen performance with Kris and Adam, and Kara DioGuardi singing to Mariah and bearing some skin for us.

Kara DioGuardi was the sexiest thing on the stage last night.  It was hot to see her show some skin and that black bikini thong.  You go girl!  I earned lots of respect for Kara with that performance.

Adam should have won but he will most likely sell more records than Kris Allen anyway.  Someone like Adam Lambert probably does not want the American Idol contract… he probably wants to do his own thing anyway which is why he was pleased from the results on his facial expressions.  He was probably thinking “thank God!”  Kelly Clarksen has been trying to change her image from the Idol winner for years.

They plan to go on tour this fall but I will just wait for Adam Lambert’s tour in a few years when its not the rest of them.  Until then it’s Green Day, No Doubt, and Beyonce on tour!  If you live in Europe you can even catch Madonna.

Girl Bar in Los Angeles has inspired the L-Word and remains one of the most happening lesbian hot spots on the West Coast. Girl Bar now runs lesbian nights in Chicago, Las Vegas and Phoenix as well as LA. The dance floor is active and energetic and drinks flow freely. While this bar has a reputation for a lipstick lesbian crowd, the actual mix is much more varied.

Henrietta Hudson Bar and Girl in New York City offers a variety of music, with live music twice a week. Drink specials, dancing and pool make Henrietta Hudson’s a good bet for both West Village locals and tourists. Henrietta’s is open 7 days and nights a week.

Chances in Houston, Texas offers something for nearly every lesbian, with four distinct bars and clubs under one roof. You can dance the night away at G-Spot, hang out with friends in the neighborhood bar Chances, lounge in the ChiChi Martini lounge or two step in The New Barn.

Phase 1 on Capitol Hill in Washington DC is the oldest lesbian bar in the country, opened in 1970. Music at Phase 1 ranges from hip hop to queer punk, with drag king nights, pool and drinks located near everything in the city.

Sue Ellen’s in Dallas, Texas is situated in the old Throckmorton Mining Company. Since the reopening in the spring of 2008, it is one of the largest lesbian bars in the country and one of the best gay or lesbian bars in the country.  Sue Ellen’s includes a lounge, dance floor and space for live music.

While these are some of the best lesbian nightclubs in the US, you may find lesbian nights at great gay clubs throughout the country or find that your local gay and lesbian club is the right fit for your community.  You might want to check out each bar or clubs website and see their calendar of events for live bands and Pride activities.

Now all the talking heads on TV are going after Wanda Sykes head.  But not her liver I don’t guess.  Why is it that no one is realizing she is a comedian.  She is not stooping down to Rush Limbaugh’s level because he is NOT a comedian as funny and entertaining as he may seem to some wackos.  Rush Limbaugh is a talking head slash pundit or political commentator or talk show host who should be held up the standards that everyone is holding Wanda Sykes up to.  Why is it that Wanda says something everyone goes bananas and Rush says something no one fears.

I don’t think people should be wishing someone ill health.. death.. or pain of any kind.   I think the context and the joking manner was different than someone like Bill O’Reilly or a non-comedian saying it.  The View commented on Wanda and even Whoppi said “it wasn’t funny”.  But what about the entire speech?  I mean seriously.  If no one laughed as they say during that part of the speech they sure loved all of it before that and after that from what I saw.  It’s funny on some shows the Miss California speech had boos and others had claps as if they edited the sound to make it look on some shows that Miss. California had supporters.  Perez Hilton says there were more people booing in the audience though.  Which makes me skeptical of any kind of sounds in the background unless you are actually there in person.

Let’s not forget how great the speech was. I thoroughly enjoyed it and had to watch it several times as it was very entertaining. If you have not watched the entire video (parts 1 and 2) make sure you do because what the media shows are just small cuts.

Wanda Sykes goes on tour this Summer as part of the True Colors comedy leg. Wanda recently came out (again) for gay rights because of Proposition 8 in California and has since been a strong advocate and help to gay rights.

Congrat’s on your new born baby
In other big news today Wanda Sykes’ wife gave birth to twins Daughter Olivia Lou and Son Lucas Claude.

We are speaking of a site that is 14-years-old and generates more than 20 billion page views per month in 50 countries and has had one murder case in Boston change the entire category for every city.  I know the Rick Sanchez and Bill O’s have been bitching for weeks about it but they are looking for an excuse to have the sections removed.  They scrape through the news everyday to find things they feel are not acceptable for others they feel should be changed.  The real wanna-be gods of our generation…because we are not adult enough to do things ourselves.

The section is not completely removed though.  It is now a Adult section under Personals in which the service providers pay a $10 fee and approved ads will be eligible for reposting at $5.  The ads will be approved by a person which will be different from the algorithm they used before.

On this same subject I watched Elliott Spitzer speak on Prostitution with Rachel Maddow yesterday and in the interview Spitzer answered as if prostitution was a victim crime and it should not be legal (but yet it was for him to take part in it).  Whether it is massage with a happy ending or more physical intercourse I think that prostitution really is not a crime that has a victim.  It is two adults consenting and unless someone is being forced into having sex like they do in some countries as slaves or such then there should be nothing wrong with it.

Is the acai berry really a superfood? Extreme claims about this berry suggest that it has cancer fighting powers, can speed up weight loss and metabolism, slow aging and improve overall health. Even conservative analysis shows high concentrations of antioxidants, vitamins, and essential fatty acids.

Studies have shown that there are highly bioavailable antioxidants in acai berries, in quantities 10 times higher than those of red grapes and 10 to 30 times higher than red wine. The berry contains a balance of amino acids ideal for good muscular health. Specifics on the antioxidant absorption of acai berries can be found at Science Daily online. The essential fatty acids in these berries contain monounsaturated oleic acid, similar to olive oil. High levels of protein and fiber make this an excellent addition to any diet. The theobromine in these berries does cause a mild stimulant effect for some people.

While the acai berry is clearly a nutritionally dense and well balanced food, can it stand up to the miracle superfood and health claims suggested by some? While it has been called the #1 superfood in the world, there is not yet any proof that adding acai berry juice or pulp to your diet will not change your life or health in dramatic or amazing ways. There have been a few promising studies, including a University of Florida study that showed that acai berries triggered a self destruct response in cancer cells; however, this was just a cell culture study.  More information is available at University of Florida site.  Further studies may show additional benefits to these berries, but many of the claims are currently unfounded.

Acai berry is certainly a healthy addition to your diet, whether you opt for pulp or juice. There is, however, no proof that you will lose weight, change your health or live longer because you drink juice containing acai berries or take acai berry supplements. As is true of most foods, it is best to consume the food as opposed to supplements containing the food.

Some of the most significant of these rights and benefits are largely financial or property rights. Without the protections of legal marriage, couples are not be entitled to survivor’s benefits, pension rights, medicaid, income tax exemptions and deductions and certain veteran’s benefits. In the case of the loss of a partner, inheritance is not automatic and property may be held up in probate even if a will is present or ownership was joint. Couples also lack the rights of legal divorce, including property division laws.

In personal and family terms, without legal marriage rights, adoption and child custody issues are problematic. Child support may not be legally mandated during a break up. Children of the relationship, if not legally adopted or biological, will not be entitled to survivors’ benefits and other rights. Bereavement, maternity and paternity leave, and sick leave are not legally protected outside of marriage. In case of a medical crisis or the death of a partner, marriage confers automatic next of kin status and the right to make all medical and end of life decisions. Immigration law impacts many couples and families. A married citizen can legally sponsor their spouse for legal status or citizenship. Gay couples have no such option and in some cases end up opting to live outside the US or separately.

In the courts, gay individuals may have less protection against domestic violence. Judicial protections and spousal immunity only apply to legal marriages. Wrongful death benefits, including the right to sue, only apply to the legal next of kin.

The full repeal of DOMA and federal recognition of same-sex marriages will allow couples across the country to access federal marriage rights, even if their own states do not support or allow for gay marriages. This offers the potential for equality for all couples and families in terms of both financial and legal rights.

We can see how this new line of underwear looks on the dark-skinned Puerto Rican hottie but what about on a skinny white boy? Well you can send in your photos to the website at discovalante.com wearing their products and be featured in the sightings section where you could be rated.

The company was founded by a Active duty naval officer. Nicholas Cassadine, a US Naval Academy graduate, also runs a Jock muscle protein supplement business marketed towards gays.

The article sent to us is from The Body (thebody.com).  They basically said that there is no need to panic if you have HIV and are worried about contracting the Swine Flu anymore than someone without HIV or AIDS.  You are not a special case and there is no emergent need to take any special precaution.

I’ve been reassuring my patients that they don’t really have to think about this flu differently than anyone else. And that’s in part because most of my patients are on HIV treatment and have undetectable viral loads and have decent CD4 counts. So for them, it really is not a special issue. It’s an issue we all have to be concerned about.

There was also a good question asked if the drugs Tamiflu and Relenza would interact with current HIV meds:

No, the drug can be used with antiretrovirals. There are no significant drug interactions. It can be used with the drugs we commonly use to treat or prevent pneumonia. So that really should not be a concern, but do keep in mind that if you were to develop flu and then develop pneumonia — of course by then, I hope you would be under the care of a doctor — that Bactrim [co-trimoxazole] may not be the right drug. So Bactrim’s a good drug for pneumocystis, but not a great drug for the types of pneumonia that might complicate flu.

I actually read two really good articles on the Swine Flu today one from Bottom line magazine that said to take some immune boosting supplements.  Keeping your immune system strong at a time like this is vital to staying away from this Swine Flu outbreak.  Actually turning down the TV to something other than Swine Flu news might also boost your immune system.  The media hype may not be too good either!

Some natural health fighting ways for ANYONE to stay away from the Swine Flu are to take Selenium, Vitamin C and D, and Lomatium dissectum, a member of the parsley family.   Selenium is the essential trace mineral is a valuable antioxidant that prevents cell damage from free radicals.

Selenium helps the immune system recognize viruses and block them from entering cells, explains Dr. Rubman. He recommends a dose of 400 micrograms (mcg) to 500 mcg a day divided into three parts — that is about four times the usual.

This doctor also advises to wash your hands a lot and to make sure you sneeze into a napkin or tissue instead of your own germ filled hands.  Another thing that caught my eye is the concoction he made up with Red Hot Chili peppers:

Another of Dr. Rubman’s flu-fighting favorites is a spicy tea concocted from echinacea, goldenseal, slippery elm bark and just a touch of the red-hot pepper capsicum. Echinacea, goldenseal and capsicum team up to fight off germs, while slippery elm allows the tea to coat the back of the throat, where viruses are most likely to take hold.

Here’s how to make it: At your local health-food store, purchase one-half ounce of powdered goldenseal root… one-half ounce of powdered echinacea root (not the whole plant)… two ounces of slippery elm bark powder… and one teaspoon of capsicum.

At home, put ingredients in a brown paper bag or plastic baggie, close tightly and shake. Transfer the contents to a screw-top jar. Give this jar a shake each time you use it in order to remix the ingredients.

To make the tea, pour one cup of very hot water into a mug over one-half teaspoon of the powder.

Maybe its safer to be prepared for this outbreak or we are all reacting too crazily and panicing.  A part of me thinks this is mostly media ratings hype and they could not have begged for something more dramatic to talk about.  I mean they asked Paris Hilton about it (TMZ) but showed it on the local Fox News.  Closing down schools and quarantining people is way out of hand.  When they are quarantining people they have taken things too far.  One thing we must realize is we have messed with nature so much that things like this will happen and we better get used to big challenges - we have treated animals so badly with hormones and made plants/seeds hybrid (thanks monsanto) and put so many pesticides into the ground among loosing so much of our natural surroundings.  We all might want to think about a stockpile of food and water for any kind of emergency where we are not able to go into public.

What if you catch Swine Flu?  There is a natural remedy that the big pharmaceutical companies do not tell you about:Classical Homeopathy (Medical Guides to Complementary and Alternative Medicine.)

Here are some popular iPhone Apps:

1.  Grindr - At GetGrindr.com you can download the app to meet guys near you on your iPhone.  Sort of like a Manhunt.net for the iPhone addicts.

2. The Gay Community App - launched in Sydney, Australia earlier this year has generated a buzz around the world.  This is a unique iPhone App allowing users to chat and meet like-minded people in their communities they live in or travel to.  It works by using the iPhones GPS and navigation to let them know whats going on in the local gay scene, make new friends, and possibly find a hottie near you.

You can find this download for the iPhone at gaycommunityapp.com or in the Apple iTunes App Store.  One of the neat things this app has is that it has a Gaydar search listing other app users by distance from your location or from one that you specify.  Facebook and twitter style profile updates.  There is a buddy list to keep track of people and location mapping system via Google Maps.

3.  G.I.R.L. Dance Radio - I at first thought this was a lesbian radio station only but I guess it means gay as in all gays and just an acronym for the G.I.R.L.  But if you want an Iphone application free with streaming of hot dance music you should download the Gay Internet Radio Live app which gives you a 128k and 64k stream.  They even have an instant feedback link to email station DJ’s.  The song information is displayed on your iPhone on each track so you can buy it when you get home and goto MasterBeat or from your phone.  This is great for working out and not having to hear the same dance playlist you always had.

4. Gaycities - iPhone app to rate gay-friendly bars, hotels, clubs, and beaches worldwide.

5.  MyGayGo - coming soon from publishers of Frontiers and IN

6. Yelp - not a gay app but you can add all your gay friends on here and get the best restaurants in the United States when you travel.  Does not work yet for France where you damn well need it.  I had one of the worst Mexican food dishes there (hey they told me it was Tex-Mex I was a “tourist”)!

7.  Pride - free app that turns the screen into a rainbow flag that fades away into the word PRIDE.  For those of you who get amused by screen savers and 80s videos.  Seems like you could do this with a Nokia phone why need an iPhone?

8. Skout is a personals site offering a iphone app you can use on your new iPhone 3GS.  You can download it free at boyahoy.com.

I hope they develop some of these same applications for the new Palm Pre coming out in May.  The Pre is set to be the next best thing to the iPhone for those of us Sprint users.

And as for gay idols there have been many in America.  Come to think of it when you think of music and acting almost the higher percentage is gay.  So why are the talking heads like Bill O’Reilly blubbering that its shocking that Adam Lambert could be gay.  Big deal he had some pics online of him making out with other guys on Myspace or some social network.  Who cares? I never knew there was a law against making out.

The media is so set on shocking people and trying out out people.  We should be focused on the quality of the talent and not the reputation from the media.  Of course what else will people like Bill O’Reilly do for his ratings if he can’t diss on gays or MSNBC.

Adam Lambert’s Myspace is private so you can’t peek inside unless he adds you as a friend and it seems he has not even signed in since February.  His being gay is no ones business but some of us gays want to know because it does mention single on his profile :).

Adam is the best thing that has happened to American Idol in a long time.  I Tivo the show each night and would be highly disappointed if he got voted off somehow.  He brings talent to the show of someone with creativity we do not see often and he is 27 years old.  Not only would it be nice for a gay person to win assuming hes gay but it would be nice for someone in their higher age group to win.

His favorite artists include Lady Gaga, Madonna, and Pink.  Three divas that are the best things to happen to music.  When he came on stage to do the Mad World song it was like Elvis had walked on stage.  He is such a great performer and I look forward to next week.

Is Adam Lambert Gay?  Judge for yourself.  Life has mystery for a reason.  It’s shocking to me that people search more about peoples personal lives than their actual talent such as their videos perfoming.

Has Amazon turned into the new Wal-Mart when it comes to censoring music and books?   Amazon claims this is a computer glitch and all of the books will be re-listed in the top sales rankings.  If we see anything happen like this again we need to investigate the situation more and evaluate if a major boycott of Amazon needs to take place.  Until we find out more on the situation you should get your books from gay friendly bookstores in your local cities.  It is a shame so many historic gay bookstores have went out of business such as the Crossroads in Dallas and the Oscar Wilde Bookshop closed down just last month.  We have got to support our gay neighborhoods and bookstores or they will close down and who will look out for our rights then?

You can still buy most of these books at Amazon.com but the high sales come from them being rated higher.   Publications can rarely survive if they have no rankings.

OK, but what about the new store opening in a place where it would be almost impossible to live (with the cute penguins pictured).  Or the spiders they are giving away at the Tulsa store with each banana purchase.  Hey this was a good one since there was a spider finding the Tulsa Whole foods that looked like an exotic deadly spider.

This all came to me in an email earlier today and for some reason I actually read the deals in the email when I normally do not.  They caught me on a good day.  April 1st.. the most creative april fools joke i have seen yet today.  Whole foods is my favorite place to shop–One of the first things I look for if I move is to have a Whole Foods near me!

Perez Hilton claims her show was all a lip sync but I have heard others say its an awesome show and that most of the seats are good seats because the way the show is setup in the round seating.  Which I normally do not care for Round seating.

If you got some Britney Tickets there is no telling what people are willing to give up to get them.  Just check your local Craigs Listing =)

We have to thank LOGO for bringing us such good shows as the Drag Race although I think everyone was in shock that BeBe won instead of Nina Flowers.  Most of the Myspace bulletions being sent out right now all think that Nina should have won.  I thought she was more fierce than Bebe Zahara Benet who won tonight.  Bebe seemed to look down too much in the background and just did not seem as magical.  I thought her crying was not all that real but maybe it was.. I will have to give her the benefit of the doubt.

I felt so sorry for Rebecca Glasscock she was under so much pressure on the Season Finale.  Having to make up a rap with Cazwell, learning choreagraphy for RuPaul’s new video, and preparing for a fate fullfilled lunch of tic tacs with RuPaul can be pretty stressful but she should have had more fun with it and had less attitude with the judges.  It says on the LOGO site that Rebecca is from Ft. Lauderdale which I frequent quite a bit but have never heard of her.  I would love to check out her show if she performs with Daisy Deadpettles at Voodoo Lounge on Sundays or wherever she does her show.  I am surprised Daisy D was not in the show she could easily be the next Supermodel drag queen.   Rebecca was stunning in drag and cute out of drag but just did not make the cut.

Ongina had the fiercest cat walk out of all of them but she probably did not deserve to get as far as she did.  I like to see some wigs when I watch drag.  Furthermore, I especially loved the episode with the butch boxer/fighter girls being made over.  That was an emotional episode for me.

This reminds me of American Idol in the way that the winner is normally not the person that you really remember.  I bet the people that stick in our heads more will be Rebecca Glasscock and Nina Flowers.  Nina Flowers will be the Clay Aiken of the competition.

Supermodel, You better Work!

There are more resources out there than you might expect for GLBT parents. In larger cities, your local gay and lesbian support organizations may offer support groups, and these can be a great way to normalize life for your children. Also, if you attend a queer friendly church, like the United Church of Christ, Unitarian, or Episcopalian, you may find couples or singles with children in the congregation. Local and nationwide organizations, like Rainbow Families at rainbowfamilies.org and Colage and colage.org are working to help families and children navigate a homophobic world.

Unfortunately, many of us will navigate our families’ lives in areas without good support resources. Parents in this situation may find themselves turning toward online resources to get the support and information that they need to help their children cope with homophobia and the realities of a different family structure. Proudparenting.com is one possible source of this support, as is http://www.queerparents.org/. Gay parents may also find blogs of other gay and lesbian parents a helpful networking tool. PlanetOut.com does have a queer parenting board, and you will find message boards for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered parents at many larger parenting sites. You may even find local families via these online resources.

Do be sure that you offer your children books, television shows, and other media that show families like theirs. Illustrating in clear terms to young children that families can come in all forms is an important validation for children. Gayparentingpage.com/Books_for_kids.htm offers a list of books with GLBT families shown.

While support, information and resources are critical, it is equally important to realize that most of the parenting dilemmas faced by queer parents are not so different from those of everyone else. Children face social difficulties regardless of their family situation and may struggle with these differences and situations. Making sure that you equip your children with information and support, and that they come home to a supportive household will go far in terms of making them comfortable in their lives. Unfortunately, homophobia will likely be a fact in our children’s lives, but with open communication and honesty, we can manage it and raise strong and happy children.

Members of the Westboro Church had plans to protest The Laramie Project, which is a play about Matthew Shepard who died from being brutally beat to death in Wyoming.  It was hate that caused this death.

I am glad to see the UK take a stand and not allow such extremism in their country.  Free speech is one thing but to protest soldiers funerals and plays which try and teach love instead of hate then these people are nut bags that should not be allowed to leave the mental home for one thing.

I wonder if this means that the hate filled rhetoric which Sally Kerns is on this list as well?

Where is the love with all these big mouths anyway?  Do they not know how to love or is all they do obsess and hate other groups?  They need to get a life for one.  They don’t want you in the UK and we certainly do not want you in our towns so stay home you haters.

Yes, we love the UK!

Marriage remains a big issue this year. New Hampshire and Maine will likely see marriage equality in 2009. New York, California, and New Jersey all have a good chance of truly equal marriages at the state level this year as well. See gayrights.change.org for a breakdown of the issue in each state and the chances of success.

During his campaign, Obama pledged his support for the Employment Non-Discrimination Act, a full repeal of the Defense of Marriage Act, hate crimes legislation, and a repeal of don’t ask, don’t tell legislation. Unfortunately, all of these require not just presidential authority, but also the support of the House and Senate. Democratic gains in these important races in the 2008 elections may make all the difference here as well.

The Employment Non-Discrimination Act or ENDA was approved by the House in 2007, but died in the Senate. It is reasonable to expect that ENDA or a similar bill incorporating protections for sexual orientation and hopefully, gender identity, will be passed in 2009.

While the chances of a full repeal of DOMA in 2009 seem slim, a Repeal DOMA protest is planned for January 10, 2009 nationwide. More information is available at queersunited.blogspot.com.

An improved federal hate crimes law including sexual orientation and gender identity seems ripe for passage this year. The Matthew Shepard Act passed both the House and Senate in 2008 and was nearly sent onto the president as a part of a Department of Defense Reauthorization package. A threatened veto prevented the possible passage of this bill. The 2007 Matthew Shepard Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevention Act (LLEHCPA) includes protections and data collection for hate crimes based on sexual identity, gender identity and gender. Dailykos.com offers a thorough overview of this issue.

While repealing don’t ask, don’t tell remains a priority for this administration, experts do not expect action to be taken in 2009. After the clear failure of don’t ask, don’t tell as a means of correcting long term military policy towards gays and lesbians, it is likely that this issue will be a sensitive one.

What can you do? Write your congresspeople. Write your senators. Call them. If there is an opportunity in your state for a town hall meeting, take the chance to speak to them in person. If issues come up in your town, city or state, be aware and do what you can. Be a face and a voice for change.

Watch out for people such as Sally Kerns who will be out there saying the craziest of things to get attention and make sure crazy witches like her do not get re-elected.  We should start now and prepare ourselves for the governor races for next year in states such as California and Texas.  There is a lot to do!

Sometimes nothing other than an expensive gift will do. A meaningful piece of jewelry or an inscribed watch may be the right present for the special person in your life. If you were pondering popping the big question, perhaps you are engagement ring shopping this year. There is something to be said for a gift that your partner can wear each day as a tangible reminder of your love.

Time together is another option when you are planning your romantic holiday together. In today’s busy world, spending time together can be one of the best gifts you can give your partner. Whether you plan a vacation together or simply a night out, taking time out of your lives to devote to one another is both a great option for romance and relationship building. Planning a day together doing something your partner loves, whether it’s a ball game or an outing to the art museum is sure to be a much treasured memory of Valentine’s Day 2008.

Some of the best romantic gifts are the ones that cost next to nothing. Write your partner a love letter, make a mix CD or play list with songs that matter to the two of you, or if you are creatively inclined, write a song or poem for your partner. While gifts from the heart may seem a bit cliche, they can be the most meaningful in any relationship. Even if you plan a day out or give an expensive gift, adding something handmade and from the heart can make this the best Valentine’s Day of your relationship.

Traditionally, flowers and Valentine Roses(possibly organic) present a sweet gift but then again there is always more room for something more romantic or something more creative.

What do you want your partner to get you on Valentines Day? A Romantic, Candle-Lit Date?

For those of you guys who like the AnF look keep in mind that it is Ed Hardy that is selling off the shelves and other clothes that really look a lot like the line that Target is carrying right now. Seriously, Target is carrying a pretty nice line of clothes that looks a lot like what you can buy at Pac Sun. Not that I am going to be seen wearing it.

The winner for the last few months is Ed Hardy. You go out and it is almost overkill in some cities like Hollister was a few years ago. This may be why the Buckle revenue (BKE) is doing so well compared to slowing revenue at Abercrombie and Fitch. Aeropostale is also seeing revenue growth which is a knock off, cheaper AnF. The Buckle sells lots of shirts and jeans that resemble the Ed Hardy line.

Here are some ads from the Abercrombie chain of stores featuring Hollister surfer style, AnF, and Ruehl. The Ruehl photo was my favorite because it actually shows the Spring shirt that will be presented at the retail chain but the store itself kind of bores me.

We are looking for someone with at least 3 years of experience web design with Wordpress, PHP, CSS, MySQL, HTML, ASP, JavaScript, Flash, Adobe/Macromedia products. Although, If you are just knowledgeable in Wordpress and databases we still may be able to use you.

We are looking to clean up our database that has totally been trashed on Wordpress, get rid of other messy Wordpress and add-on glitches, and add some design work.  We also have an .asp site that has design problems that need to be worked on.

Send us an email to this contact us or email us with any sites you have worked on before and your speciality.

The privacy thing online I will agree has gone too far. We should not be able to see what our neighbors are doing or have done. Even if they did something horrible they should still have a chance to be forgiven and not treated like the scarlet letter. This is certainly not Google’s fault this is happening. It is the fault of the jerks such as Bill O’Reilly who want all the doings of people be stated all over the place. They started this and now they don’t want to be the ones in the spotlight. They do not want their houses appearing as the jerk or pinhead or bad guy or soul less person.

Eightmaps.com is where you can find the proposition 8 supports and see if they live in your neighborhood. This is a fantastic idea given that EVERYTHING and anything else can be detected online these days. I guarantee these same pinheads that want to do away with everyone’s privacy will start wishing they had some privacy of their own. This is also a good idea because its good to be able to see what neighbor donated to Prop 8 and is fake to your face. Talk about “coming out” of the closet.

Bill O’Reilly discussed this on his show as if it would be used as a violent weapon. This is used not for violence but to find out who near them they know are against what they believe and find out who they can trust in their neighborhood. It will show people to think twice before they donate towards hate. Eightmaps showed great initiative in doing this and I applaud them.

After all would you rather live in a neighborhood where Sally Kerns lives or one of these freaky prop 8 supporters. Those people looked scary from the videos.. I mean how long since they have been laid or are they also coming up for the Child Molestation on the map pins as well? That would be like living on Freddy Kruger lane.

Who owns 8 maps?  This site is privately listed just like most of the sites on the internet so the hag from Townhall.com saying that the owners of the site are hiding out and are cowards has no idea what she’s talking about.  Although, I do think there needs to be more regulation on private domain names because I have had many people copy my site and end up having to try to find the owners for stealing my content.  Billoreilly.com is not even listed in his name Bill O’Reilly.  Hey, if the owner of 8 maps wants to contact me then please do so because I would love to advertise on your site and support it!

Which resolutions have a chance of sticking? Probably none of mine, if we’re all honest. That said, there are resolutions that work. Do you need to spend more time with friends and family? This one sticks, for many people. If you’ve resolved to learn something new, and take active steps to get started, you might manage to keep this one as well. Taking steps now, while you’re enthused and energetic about your resolutions can help you to keep them. Schedule regular time with friends today and enroll in that class or order the book.

Consider enlisting a friend or significant other for support. You may simply need someone to help keep you on track or you may want to find a friend with a similar resolution for the New Year. Getting to the gym is more likely if you have someone to go with you and eating right is easier if you’re all having salad. If you’ve committed to improving at work, make an appointment to talk to your boss and ask for a review or ask a coworker for their honest assessment. Consider hiring a personal trainer, nutritionist or organizer if you think it would help you. For some of us, putting our money where our resolutions are can make all the difference.

My partner didn’t make any resolutions. There was a speech about constant self improvement, not just at New Year’s. I don’t know that I believe this. New to do lists have appeared on my refrigerator and entries in that long ignored blog. I am glad not to be the only one hoping for a bit of self improvement in our house this year.

I’ve ticked things off my to do list, including writing this today. I’ve made a healthy dinner and called my mother. I’m off to try to figure out how to use that Wii Fit I’ve had for six months and then I think I’ll go reward myself with a brownie. I meant to bake more this year, after all…

Just think the Nation itself will have one great New Year’s Resolution accomplished bringing in a New President and hopefully seeing a brighter economy and more peace in the world.

If you have been single all along, you can probably stop reading right now. You likely have the social life you want, simply because it’s never been significantly changed in one way or the other and has evolved to meet your interests and lifestyle. There is nothing at all wrong with being happily single and living a full life on your own.

More of us, however, are single due to being either newly out or newly broken up. While you might have meandered into your local gay bar and found yourself either ignored or fresh meat, depending on your community, perhaps this is not what you’re looking for at all. You can meet people, find friends and develop relationships within the gay and lesbian community without setting foot in a drag show, drinking shots out of test tubes or otherwise potentially embarrassing yourself in a drunken stupor.

What can you do? Even in smaller cities, you do have many options to meet people outside of the bar subculture. First, become involved in things you love that matter. It does not matter if that is the local animal shelter or the local arts scene. Consider volunteering your time with gay, lesbian and other queer causes. Many of those who volunteer are in a place in their lives that is also incompatible with weekends drinking in the bars. Be open and honest about who you are, whenever you feel safe and comfortable doing so. You might be surprised who you can meet. Moreover, making the most of your life and your time will make for a happy and full life, whether you are alone or not. Once you feel comfortable in your own skin and your own life, if you want to actively pursue finding a relationship, consider on line dating options, social networking sites, and even just putting the word out to friends that you’re looking. Many great relationships have been made by matchmaking friends.

We are excited to bring you something you can really use in this day of too much information and never being able to find anything online.  There are many, many websites that make things too hard to find coupons, discounts, sales and most anything for the male consumer.  It was even hard to find the Men’s Express clothing store in some malls and online.

I have compiled a search engine that makes it so you can search out specific things such as mens hoodies, belts, and hard to find cuffs and bracelets.  You will be able to find Puma shoes, converse, and cute tighty undies from sites such as Andrew Christian in the search.  I have included gay retailers, the biggest trend setting retailers such as MetroPark, The Buckle, Ed Hardy, Guess, A/X, and Hollister.  Department stores such as Macy’s large database can also be found in here.

Feel free to comment to add a store that you feel is not included in the search.  I will check out as many magazines like Instinct and Details to find the hottest fashions for guys and make sure those links are included for this search engine to seek out.

This is a really cool project and will be fun to get all of these clothing stores and smaller shops together into one search without having to weed through all the junk on the internet.  These will be the more fashionable retailers for college, teen, and young adults.

We expect to have one of these available for the girls next year so stay tuned and send us suggestions for both.

MSNBC anchor Rachel Maddow is finding her way into millions of American households and has improved the network’s ratings during the 9:00 PM hour. She’s insightful, liberal, politically savvy and openly gay. Maddow started her public media career on Air America with her own liberal talk radio show. Maddow’s radio show covers both headline news and the political analysis behind the headlines. She appeared on both CNN and MSNBC in 2005 and 2006, adding her voice to election coverage on CNN’s Paula Zahn Now. In January, 2008 she was named a political analyst for MSNBC, appearing on “Countdown with Keith Olbermann” and “Race for the White House”. The Rachel Maddow Show began on MSNBC on September 8, 2008, airing at 9:00 PM Eastern every weekday. She continues her Air America radio program nightly at 6:00 PM Eastern. Maddow’s show, along with Olbermann’s, provides MSNBC viewers with a full three hours of liberal commentary, debate and discussion weeknight.

Maddow is a former Rhodes Scholar with a P.h.D. in political science from Lincoln College at Oxford University. Prior to her work as a political commentator and television and radio host, she worked in both HIV/AIDS activism and prison reform, making these the subject of her doctoral dissertation. Her radio career began on stations in Massachusetts, eventually leaving for Air America’s Unfiltered and later her own show.

Rachel Maddow’s shows, both on radio and TV, offer a funny and quick moving look at the news of the day, politics and pop culture. Her radio show typically includes a look at the war and life in wartime in Iraq, “underbelly” which looks at the politics behind the news, and interviews with various political and pop culture icons. Her MSNBC show offers interviews with journalists and newsmakers of all sorts, a look at underreported news stories, and a regular segment called “Talk Me Down” about the day’s news.

She is open about her personal life, and was the first out gay or lesbian individual to become a Rhodes Scholar. Today, she splits her time between New York City and a home in rural Massachusetts with her partner, artist Susan Mikula. The couple has been together since 1999.

In 2008, Maddow topped Out Magazines “Out 100 List” of the most culture moving gay men and women in America. Whether you consider her a broadcaster, a news anchor or a political pundit, Rachel Maddow has brought a new face and a new voice to both a major news network. Maddow is an intelligent voice for liberal politics and a liberal agenda, but does it with class, grace and top notch debating skills.  She also received the cover of the Advocate magazine and named the “Smartest Woman on Television.”

Here are some quotes we have seen on blogs about Rachel Maddow’s success on MSNBC:

“It is so good to see a SMART woman who doesn’t have bleached blond hair with low cut dresses on as a host of a good “talking heads” show…and of course, I agree with her most of the time.  I sometimes catch her at 1 am and usually do not watch during prime time but guess I should record (I am often up at 1 am)” – Mary, Chicago

People overall seem to like Rachel because she is nice and smart without being as cocky as her male counterparts.  We still watch Keith Olbermann on Countdown but love the addition to MSNBC.  I have to at least watch his special comments and the Worst Persons in the World showdown.  I am mostly happy about her beating Sean Hannity and Colmes in some of the ratings because we deserve good, quality reporting and journalism instead of all the trash repeated all day on Fox News.  The funny thing about all of this is that I originally had a dream Rachel would get her own show on MSNBC then she started filling in for Keith and it all began.

Two out gay actors can be seen on major network television each week. Neil Patrick Harris has a major role as Barney Stinson in CBS’ How I Met Your Mother. Grey’s Anatomy star T.R. Knight is also out of the closet and open about his sexuality. Both play straight characters and both were first outed by the incessant rumor mills of Hollywood, but acknowledged their sexuality publicly and openly. While based in Britain, Sir Ian McKellan is perhaps the most famous gay actor working in films today. McKellan came out in 1988 and is a prominent voice for gay men in television and films. Out gay men in Hollywood remain a rarity. Rumors fly that leading men are gay or bisexual, but they keep their private lives private to preserve their careers in a homophobic world.

Out lesbians are more common, and possibly more accepted in Hollywood. Ellen and Portia’s recent wedding made the cover of major magazines in grocery stores across America. Rosie O’Donnell has been out for several years and remains a vocal figure in the entertainment world. Lindsay Lohan’s recent acknowledgement of her relationship reveals a new generation of young, out celebrities. Criminal Minds’ star Kristin Vangsness and Fringe actress Jasika Nicole are both open about their sexuality. While Jodie Foster has guarded her privacy for many years, she did out herself in a thanks to her partner Cyndey Bernard in December of 2007. Comedian Wanda Sykes officially outed herself in the wake of the Proposition 8 vote. Sex in the City actress Cynthia Nixon has also come out publicly, with no harm done to her career. Women clearly can keep their careers and sex appeal in Hollywood in a way that gay men may not yet be capable of, even if they are willing to let the public know about their private relationships.

The recent release of Milk has left some asking whether straight actors can and should play gay when it’s appropriate or if gay actors should be favored for gay roles.  While Milk, like Brokeback Mountain, includes prominent Hollywood actors, they are all straight actors. Many gay actors find themselves nearly exclusively limited to gay roles. It is no significant surprise that many gay and lesbian actors simply keep their private lives hidden from public view to avoid losing access to good roles and opportunities.

Who’s Next?

The cover of OUT Magazine had Paul Wentz from Fall Out Boy declaring he was a “Fa-g” but for reals we know better than that.  He is one hell of a hot metrosexual. American Idol runner-up Clay Aiken came out in 2008 but we all sort of knew that was coming.  Who will be the next Celebrity to come out of the closet? Stay tuned for what 2009 has in store!

One option that some couples choose is to simply retain their own finances. They split expenses in a way that is even and fair, share the costs of entertainment, food, and dining out, and retain two checking accounts, separate savings and investments. They may or may not have a joint account to cover household expenses and split those accordingly. This option can make managing vacations, home purchases, and major costs of that sort more challenging, but also protects each partner’s financial independence. This option is less effective if there is a significant financial disparity between partners, if one becomes unemployed, or if a partner stays home to raise children. This choice may be wise if the two of you find communicating about money matters especially challenging.

A middle of the road option allows both couples to contribute to joint savings, investments and checking accounts. Financial decisions are made jointly; however, both partners retain their own individual checking and credit accounts and free access to their own funds. This option does require more willingness to discuss money regularly and analyze how money is being used, amounts being contributed, etc. Should one partner be unemployed or there be a substantial financial disparity, this may require additional discussion to keep financial equality within the relationship.

Finally, the couple may choose to simply combine their financial affairs, agree upon a budget and maintain entirely joint accounts. This option can be more challenging if the relationship fails, since both partners’ money is entangled in joint financial affairs. It is, however, a more equitable choice if one partner is staying at home with children. Do be sure that you have good communication over money if sharing finances this fully. You may need to discuss spending on a regular basis and be certain to have a budget and stick to that budget.

Whichever financial choice you make as you blend households, keep in mind that money is a problem for many couples. If you find yourselves struggling with communication issues related to money early on, consider meeting with a relationship counselor or financial advisor to help you plan your financial future.

Many people read self help books now and again, and some of the most popular concern relationships. Keeping a long term relationship happy, passionate and loving can be a challenge regardless of the gender of your partner. Fortunately, there are a number of books on the market specifically dedicated to gay and lesbian relationships. Consider taking a look at Mackey, O’Brien, and Mackey’s Gay and Lesbian Couples: Voices from Lasting Relationships, Betty Berzon’s Permanent Partners: Building Gay and Lesbian Relationships that Last, and Tina Tessina’s Gay Relationships as a starting point if you have concerns or questions about your relationship. You may also find it helpful to read resources intended for straight couples, including the well regarded The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Do keep in mind that some of the information in resources aimed at heterosexual couples may not be useful to you, and that research does show that gay and lesbian couples often communicate quite differently due to the lack of gender roles typically present.

Some of the time our relationships do need more help than old fashioned open communication and self help books can offer. Consider relationship counseling if you and your partner are struggling. If you are part of an inclusive faith community, you may find that pastoral counseling or even relationship workshops are an option for you and your partner. If this is not an option for you, your local gay and lesbian center may be the best starting point when looking for relationship help. Mental health referrals, including those for relationship counseling, are commonplace at gay and lesbian resource centers and you can be sure that your counselor is comfortable and experienced in assisting with the issues specific to GLBTQ couples.

The same basics are true for any relationship. In order to have a healthy relationship with your partner, you need love, passion, and open communication. You also need shared interests, goals, hopes and dreams. With these in place, many of the minor challenges and struggles can be overcome to allow you and your partner to share many happy years together.

Harvey Milk is known in San Francisco and around the country as a gay leader and hero.  There will also be Memorials held in various places in time for the 30th anniversary of Harvey Milk.

Harvey Milk Memorial 11-27-08 at 9pm on sidewalks of santa monica blvd where it meets san vicente.  To create an aerial candlelit equal sign demonstrating power of peace and unity.  A dignified ceremony marking the 30th anniversary of Harvey Milk, a gay rights pioneer and the first openly gay man elected to public office.

Recently, a Harvey Milk day was vetoed by Governor Schwarzenegger on September 30.  This bill AB 2567 would require the governor proclaim May 22 each year as Harvey Milk Day.  It is too bad this did not pass but we should all go out and support the movie and attend his Memorial if in a city where either is going on.

Everyone I speak to in the gay community think that Proposition 8 in California was the best thing to ever happen to gay rights.  It not only opened up the floodgates for the LGBT community to be motivated to get out there and be active but it is really bringing us together.  I attended the rally in Houston today at city hall and took some great photos of the event.

This was a highly respectable event with people dressed nicely and showing up to support love instead of hate.  I was so impressed with the speakers and the performance from Jason and deMarco who sung in a Capella.

Two lesbians took stage who have been married and not sure their current marriage status in California gave the most emotional speech.  It was an enlightening event to bring the gay community together and see so many gay youth attending.  This was no gay pride parade, nightclub, or house party but a meeting at city halls across the nation that really showed we want and deserve marriage rights just like anyone else.  America was made to give rights to minorities not to be taken away from majorities.  It was great to see everyone out and about coming together for our futures.

First, if there is a local gay and lesbian center or organization in your area, this can be one of the best places to start looking for gay networking options. Okay, you may not be the support group type, nor in a place where you need help coming out, but quite often these centers can also offer resources, like local gay professional networking groups. If you have a local professional networking organization, this can be one of the best ways to meet other gay individuals in a relaxed setting, and might even help you make valuable professional connections. Some large corporations also maintain their own gay and lesbian professional groups within the company. If yours does, make time to participate.

Another great networking resource is local volunteer groups. You will find many LGBT folk volunteering at AIDS and HIV related organizations, but also working with queer youth, doing outreach education and volunteering in matters of sexual health. Spending some time helping out with LGBT related issues can allow you to meet others and share your skills in a meaningful way.

While it may sound simple, being out will help you to meet others. If you are open about your sexuality and relationships, you will find that others come out to you. No one is suggesting you go to work wrapped in your rainbow flag, but openness does send a message to those around you that you are comfortable in your own skin, and may allow you to meet others around you.

One website that really sticks out is Linkedin.com they feature a search where you can find other gay and lesbian professionals to show off your resume or befriend. There is also facebook but linkedin is more on the professional level for those looking to get ahead in a particular industry.

Churches seem to get the free ride when it comes to taxes and we all know they are dipping into politics way more than they should.  They should be taxed just like everyone else!  We at least need to make sure this is enforced.

We should have been undercover in the churches with small recording devices.  We damn well should have been doing this.

I think the best place to make a donation right now is lambdalegal.org to help get the ball running on this.  Marching and honking may make noise but the real noise is making phone calls and sending emails to people that can make a difference.

Here’s how you get it done:

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (also known as the “Mormon” or LDS Church) has gone too far in promoting the 2008 California Proposition 8, which would claims to amend the California state constitution to define marriage as one man and one woman in order to supersede a state supreme court opinion issued earlier this year. [Whether the proposition was a lawful amendment or a revision that cannot legally be made by a voter initiative remains an open question.]

Section 501(c)(3) of US Code Title 26, which governs tax-exempt organizations, reads (emphasis added):

(3) Corporations, and any community chest, fund, or foundation, organized and operated exclusively for religious, charitable, scientific, testing for public safety, literary, or educational purposes, or to foster national or international amateur sports competition (but only if no part of its activities involve the provision of athletic facilities or equipment), or for the prevention of cruelty to children or animals, no part of the net earnings of which inures to the benefit of any private shareholder or individual, no substantial part of the activities of which is carrying on propaganda, or otherwise attempting, to influence legislation (except as otherwise provided in subsection (h)), and which does not participate in, or intervene in (including the publishing or distributing of statements), any political campaign on behalf of (or in opposition to) any candidate for public office.

(The “otherwise provided” clause does not apply, as the LDS Church, being a church, is a disqualified entity as described in subsection (h).)

The LDS church, through inciting its members to donate time and means to support Proposition 8 (resulting in millions of dollars of cash contributions from its members and countless volunteer hours), and in-kind campaign contributions to a group that supports Proposition 8, has now made a substantial part of its activities attempting to influence legislation.

You can help! Send the IRS an official complaint about the LDS Church’s activities, either by email, fax or US Mail.

1. Prepare a copy of the Official LDS Prop. 8 Letter read in all LDS churches in California on 29 June 2008.
2. Prepare one or more other articles of your choice (you can use these links, or do your own research) showing the LDS Church’s substantial activities attempting to influence this legislation.
3. Prepare this Pre-Filled IRS Form 13909 and add your personal information, or fill out a Blank IRS Form 13909 from scratch with the information in the pre-filled form (these links and an alternative filled form are copied below in RESOURCES.)
4. Don’t forget to date your referral at the top and include your submitter information. If you are a member of the Church, you may wish to check the box marked “I am concerned that I might face retaliation or retribution if my identity is disclosed.”
5. Send it to the IRS, either by:
   * Email: Prepare your documents as PDF’s or web links, and send your complaint form with supporting documentation to eoclass@irs.gov.
   * Fax: fax your documents to (214) 413-5415
   * Mail: mail your documents to
   IRS EO Classification
   Mail Code 4910DAL
   1100 Commerce Street
   Dallas TX 75242-1198

RESOURCES:
Official IRS Complaint Process for Tax-Exempt Organizations
US Code Title 26, Section 501
Official LDS Prop. 8 Letter
List of LDS Entities (Source of Tax ID Number)

Information required for IRS Form 13909:
Name of Referred Organization: The Corporation of the President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
Street Address: 50 E. North Temple St., Salt Lake City UT 84150
Organization’s EIN: 23-7300405
For Section 4, see the Pre-Filled IRS Form 13909, or write your concerns in your own words. If your reader will not open that form, try the Alternative Pre-Filled 13909.

Thanks to a formerly faithful member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (”the Church”) for the update to this for us to take action.

Gays and Lesbians will now know that they can’t just go around thinking that a minority will care about the GLBT cause.  The “minorities” will look out for their selfish religious beliefs first.  It was sad to see so many blacks voting for Proposition 8 as if they forgot what being discriminated against was like and as if they forgot what it felt to be on this side of the fence.

Ellen Degeneres said on her blog today that:

This morning, when it was clear that Proposition 8 had passed in California, I can’t explain the feeling I had. I was saddened beyond belief. Here we just had a giant step toward equality and then on the very next day, we took a giant step away.

I believe one day a “ban on gay marriage” will sound totally ridiculous. In the meantime, I will continue to speak out for equality for all of us.

We can hope that a Democratic controlled congress and senate and president will change things for gay rights but I have my doubts.  They want to get re-elected in 2-4 years and how can they if they dare approve of such a thing as gay marriage, hate crime legislation, and putting more money into a real hiv cure.

GLBT lost a lot this election even worse off than we were 2 years ago.  Sally Kerns in Oklahoma got re-elected - you know the lady who calls Gays Terrorists.  Keith Olbermann has not made her a Worst Person in the World for some reason I sure wish he would.  This lady is the witch of witches.  I have a friend in her district of 86 in OKC and he could not believe she won again.

There was also Andrew Rice out of Oklahoma who got beat out.  Then there was Florida who voted to put more discrimination against gays in their constitution.  I could expect this attitude out of Arizona but why Florida and California.  How disappointing is that?

We can be proud of Massachetts who legalized marriage and pot but pretty much disguisted with the rest of the country right now!

Bottom Line:  We pay taxes just like everyone else.  Equal rights should be given to every tax-paying citizen.  Keep in mind these churches do not pay taxes but yet they seem to control every social issue in our government.

Cost cutting measures can make a big difference in your budget. If you do opt for your traditional holiday open house, dinner party or cocktail party, limit the drinks served. Alcohol is a huge expense when entertaining, especially if you fully stock a bar. Consider serving a spiced cider or a lovely cranberry based cocktail to all your guests to reduce your expenses. Old fashioned, non alcoholic holiday punches are another great idea and are typically much more affordable than alcoholic drinks. There are several good boxed wines on the market now that are significantly more economical, but still quite drinkable.  Less expensive cuts of meat or vegetarian meals are another way to reduce the expense of your traditional holiday party. You might also consider sharing costs and hosting responsibilities with a friend or family member if you have the same or similar guests lists.

One of the best ways to fit holiday entertaining into your budget is to rethink your party planning. Replace your cocktail party with a family tree trimming party. Invite everyone and their kids, serve cocoa and cookies and string popcorn and cranberries or sing holiday songs. You could also consider organizing a cookie swap to share baked goods with friends in lieu of the usual party, or even plan a party around a much anticipated holiday season ball game and serve sandwiches and snacks. Casual meals also offer the option of an old fashioned potluck. Let everyone bring a dish to share and relax.

More formal holiday activities can work without breaking the bank, as long as you step away from plans to throw large dinner or cocktail parties. Dessert parties are a great choice, allowing you to entertain for an evening with limited stress and without spending a lot. You can make dessert or splurge and buy a luxurious treat or two to share with friends or family. Serve coffee, a hot alcoholic beverage or a dessert wine, depending upon the treat you choose. Hosting a breakfast or brunch may also cut your costs and help you stay within budget. Consider throwing a wine tasting, asking each guest to bring their favorite to share. Serve a variety of fondues and dips. Fortunately, many of these money saving ideas can save valuable time during the holiday season as well.

TIP: Takes some notes from our Summer party ideas.

Throwing a Halloween Party?

We recommend Dry Ice arrangements to make a spooky fog or maybe a fog machine to make things more fun.  There are several games you can play such as where you say Halloween related phrases in a circle or your typical party games.  Why not a spin the bottle Halloween style?  Well, I guess an OUIJA board would serve that purpose a little better to be in the ghostly spirit.

Themed Parties

Think of a theme such as a 80’s, 90’s, or White Trash Theme.  This year with the presidential election you could come up with a theme party.  Dress up as Sarah Palin, Ellen, or even Hillary.  I always thought it would be fun to have a Party Monster party or even a Drag Queen party where every one has to dress as the opposite sex.

Christmas Parties

If you are throwing a serious Christmas extravaganza then consider some of these top ten gift ideas for your friends and relatives.  If for fun, then go for these gag gifts for the Secret Santa.

There are, of course, some famous ones: Pricilla Queen of the desert, To Wong Foo, thanks for everything Julie Newmar and The Birdcage, for example, though with that last one I would recommend the original La Cage aux folles. But what other gay movies are out there that you may not have heard about? That’s what I thought I would find out for you.

Have you heard of Law of Desire? This 1987 film from Spanish director Pedro Almodovar stars Antonio Banderas stalking the man of his dreams - and yes, there is a man-sex scene in there. Do you remember My beautiful laundrette, with Daniel Day Lewis? This caused quite a storm when it first came out thanks to the overt homosexuality and interracial relationships, particularly as Daniel plays a gay skinhead.

As we’re in Britain at the moment, what about Beautiful Thing? Directed by Hettie Macdonald and set in inner London this too caused quite a stir when it was released. It had enjoyed a good West End run as a play before transferring to the big screen and is something of a collectors’ item.

Ok, so there is a wealth of good, and not so good, gay indies out there to find – but where to find them is the next question. Try strandreleasing.com an online shop that has several genres, one of which is Gay and Lesbian. It’s interesting to note that many gay films deal with AIDS and you have to wonder if independent film makers would have found an audience for their gay films were it not for AIDS – it is the subject of many good indie films. (I know there were the likes of Midnight Cowboy before AIDS, but those films didn’t really have ‘gay’ as the central theme, or else they portrayed gay people as the bad guy or the comedy camp role, if at all.)

Zero Patience, directed by John Greyson stands out as one to find on line and buy. It looks at the alleged first man to bring AIDS to the USA and is by turns funny, dramatic and sad. There is also the fabulous Geoffrey, with Patrick Stuart in a camp role adding humor. This story is about a guy refusing to ever have sex again for fear of catching HIV. It too is a mix of funny and sad, with Mother Teresa playing the piano to top things off at the end.

Many of these indie films have come, originally, from plays but there are still many good plays waiting in the wings to be made into films. To find out what’s coming up in the world of gay independent films take a look at filmmovement.com where, among other things, you can find out about the 20th London Lesbian and Gay film festival. That was only one search result, festivals like this happen in Seattle, Paris, Tokyo and many other places. It’s just a question of how you search.

I have wondered what took so long with Madonna and Guy Ritchie breaking up. He was the main reason that Madonna and her brother supposedly quit talking and he never really got behind her music. He was too busy being jealous of Madonna’s accomplishments and not really doing anything for himself.

Let’s all hope that the pre-nuptial agreement was around before they got hitched. I am afraid from some of the news stories I have read that they may not have had a pre-nup which could really put a dent in Madonna’s worth. According to the Sun.co.uk who originally broke the story they said they were more worried about the kids than anything.

This news just so happens right in the middle of her Sticky and Sweet tour hitting Boston, MA. Madonna is scheduled to perform tonight at 8pm at the TD Banknorth Gardens. I will be attending the concert myself on Thursday and very excited to see her new show!!

Madonna has also been in the news this week for banning Sarah Palin from attending her concert and wearing high heels that look like a gun sparking controversy with some gun rights groups. Teens wear gun and knive logos on their shirts these days bought from Pac Sun and MetroPark and Madonna is doing nothing but stomping on the gun with her feet she is not pointing it at anyone. Although she did say she would beat up Sarah Palin… I hope someone will!!

David Grey, producer for the gay film company Village Film, recently made a short film entitled ‘Queer Fear – gay life, Gay death in Iraq.’ The movie charts the tragic stories of several Iraqi individuals who are gay; it is not an easy movie to watch. Since its release, it is said, the situation has not improved, and it may in fact have become worse for gay and lesbian people in Iraq.

The reality is that in today’s ‘liberated’ Iraq, being gay or lesbian has become a death sentence. (Just as it is for a woman to have sex outside of marriage.) Anyone who is deemed to be insufficiently devout and pure is at risk of assassination, particularly in areas such as Basra, a city that the British military have now abandoned. This is, in effect, sexual cleansing and the death squads are boasting that they have exterminated all “perverts and sodomites” in many of the country’s other main cities.

There is a covert gay rights movement in the country. We know this because several members of it have gone missing after documenting the abuse of rights and the killing of gay men and women, and getting the news to the outside world. Commentators believe that the situation in Iraq is now worse for lesbian, gay and transgender people than it was under the rule of Saddam Hussein.

But, in the true spirit of the free voice, Iraqi LGBT is bringing the news to the world at large and trying to make a difference. Their site, iraqilgbtuk.blogspot.com, based in the UK, is keeping a watch on international reportage while raising funds to help fight the cause. It was while browsing this site that I found more, yet similar, disturbing news:

“This morning, [25th September 2008, just after the Tatchell article was published] news came from Iraq that the coordinator of Iraqi LGBT in Baghdad, Bashar, aged 27, has been assassinated in a barber shop. Militias burst in and sprayed his body with bullets.”

What can the Iraqi people do about it? You may well ask. Sadly the answer is not a lot. Going to the police for protection is a non-starter as the police are infiltrated by fundamentalists, especially in the Badr militia. Pro-fundamentalist ministers in the Government are turning a blind eye to the killings and, if one’s government will not help, who else is there? There are organizations like Iraqi LGBT, doing what they can from a distance, and individuals too can add their voice and their views. Outrage, the direct action group formed in the UK to fight what they see as violations of human rights in the GLBT community, also accept donations and provide help to Iraq GLBT. And the media around the world is slowly picking up on the subject, I am thinking of recent articles in Newsweek and the UK gay paper, the Pink Paper, in particular here.

Your own views are your own of course and not everyone will read the above from the same viewpoint as those who report it. But the clear message is that, in this part of the world, a battle rages between the religion and rights, a battle that will going on for many years and may never end. Which means the killing of fellow LGBT people will never stop either. Unless those of us lucky enough to be born elsewhere try to make a difference.

NOTES:

Queer Fear,  the mentioned movie is available to stream at http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=uB7TcPGXlHY

‘Hazings’ are also known as ‘initiations’ – things that one group of people will do to another person in order for that person to be allowed to join a group, gang or even a Fraternity. The word derives from a 17th century Scottish word meaning to frighten, scold or beat cattle while driving them, and from the French Haser, to tease or insult.

No surprises then that Hazings have received some bad press as many initiation ceremonies go further than just simple teasing, and include harassment, humiliation and even physical abuse. You may have seen movies such as The Skulls (2000) which took entry into a college fraternity as its theme – the guys there started out with fun and adventurous rituals to perform, such as stealing the weathervane from a tower. But these soon started to turn nasty and dangerous, both physically and emotionally, for the characters. And that’s the warning.

Hazing has been a popular activity in school and sports institutions for many years, especially among the male of our species. I can remember innocent things which we now call hazing; having to carry someone’s bags, or being dared to do something only slightly mischievous like make a face at a teacher behind his back. Now though these things are becoming increasingly more brutal and institutions and individuals are finding themselves in court over what they have allowed to happen. Here is an example from nola.com, dated May 2008: “Five members of a Tulane University fraternity were arrested Tuesday and five others are being sought on felony battery charges in an alleged hazing incident in which two pledges received second- and third-degree burns from boiling water and crab-boil being poured on their bodies.”

But not all hazings involve such extreme measures and there can be a lot of pleasure to be gained from viewing home videos (on the Tube sites for example) and realty movies on some adult sites – particularly as hazing is fast becoming a fetish genre in the adult industry.

Here’s an example: I searched out collegehazing.com a site dedicated to the practice of sexual humiliation among new guys at college. Images here ranged from guys who were simply ‘mooning’ (showing off their asses) to being bound and stripped. Having to flash one’s dick to the general public is a fairly common and innocuous activity, but licking someone’s ass in order to be accepted in to a football team may leave a nasty taste in the mouth, particularly if you’re a straight guy. Many of these initiations happen during parties, or certainly when there is alcohol around and it is not uncommon to see guys who are unconscious through too much drink being stripped, and even masturbated, while the others look on and the cameras click away.

So is it always a homoerotic pastime I ask myself? Is there always a sexual side to hazing? No, not always but it does seem that even the straightest of football players will stand by and watch as another guy gets naked. It may build team spirit and help the guys to bond but how far will they go to be in a team? Cyd Zeigler Jr., on outsports.com points out: Many of the acts that younger players are submitted to are also homoerotic or homosexual. Licking each other’s bodies, simulating sex acts, forced sodomy with various objects – these acts work on two levels. First, they reinforce the notion that same-sex affection is weaker; the subjected men are rarely “hazed” with forced affection from someone of the opposite sex. Second, they serve to satisfy the latent homosexuality of many of the players involved.

So hazing, in these all male situations, is about domination, both of the body and the mind. It can be seen on various levels: fun, when innocuous; sexual, when nudity, simulated and even actual sex is involved; and powerful as, at the end of the day, the group, the herd, tribe, sports team or gang is the thing that holds the power to accept or reject the person fighting for the right to join them. The trouble is, in the wrong hands or when out of control it can simply go too far.

Many of the financial problems in the queer community are much like those elsewhere. Overspending and lack of savings are both relevant issues within the community as a whole. Preventing overspending is easier than you might think. In the simplest, terms spend less than you make. Making a budget with categories for your housing costs, transportation, food and entertainment will help you avoid falling into an overspending trap. Entertainment can be a big expense, particularly if you are still single. Make sure that you budget for meals out, drinks at the bar and other costs in order to keep your budget in check. Be especially careful with credit cards. You should also set reasonable savings goals and take advantage of any retirement savings plans your employer may offer. An emergency savings account is also a smart financial move for anyone, and should, ideally, be enough for you to live on for several months.

One of the biggest issues for many GLBT individuals is handling financial issues within a relationship. Unfortunately, same-sex couples often bear higher financial burdens than heterosexual couples. You may not be able to take advantage of a partner’s employer provided health insurance, will pay higher taxes, and have to be certain that wills and powers of attorney are in order.

Some couples choose to maintain individual finances; however, a long term relationship typically comes with some joint responsibilities. Joint checking accounts and shared investment accounts are both options when managing your money. Shared property ownership is legally viable and easier than you might think. Consider making sure that all real property, including your home and vehicles is in both your names.

You will need to have your will and other legal paperwork in order. Also, do keep in mind that your partner and even your children depending upon legalities may not have survivors’ rights to your social security. Additional life insurance may be a smart financial move to protect your family. Check with local queer support resources for a recommendation for a financial advisor or attorney experienced in helping couples with retirement and estate planning if needed.

First, find a queer friendly gynecologist or health care provider. For many women, a family practitioner or even a nurse practitioner at your local Planned Parenthood office may be a better option than a traditional gynecologist. Whoever you choose to provide your health care should be queer friendly and understanding of the special concerns of the lesbian community. Do be prepared to advocate for yourself.

The tests you regularly need will vary depending upon your age, special health concerns and sexual behavior. You should keep in mind that while the risk of STD transmission for lesbians is lower than for heterosexual women, it is not nonexistent. Gay.com/health offers an easy breakdown of possible STD risks. Women in committed relationships or those who religiously practice safer sex with their partners may feel comfortable without STD testing. You should be comfortable discussing your sexual behavior with your health care provider so the two of you can best assess which tests should be a part of your regular care.

Breast and cervical cancer screenings should occur as recommended by your health care provider, ideally annually. Keep in mind that regular screenings are critical for early cancer detection and the best chance of successful treatment. The frequency of pap smears and breast cancer exams will depend on your personal health history, age and other factors. It can be easy to skip regular exams, especially without the need for contraception; however, establishing care with a trusted provider and having screenings as appropriate is critical to overall good health. Both health care providers and patients are guilty of assuming that the lack of male sexual partners eliminates the risk of cervical dysplasia and thus the need for routine pap testing. More information on cancer screening for lesbians and other queer women can be found at temenos.net.

Some information indicates that women who have primarily had female sexual partners may be at higher risk for breast, endometrial, and ovarian cancers. This is an individual issue, related not to sexual behavior but rather to pregnancy and the use of oral contraceptives. Certain behavioral issues in the lesbian community can contribute to health risks. These include higher rates of smoking, excessive alcohol consumption and obesity. Again, your personal risk factors for these issues may be low, but they should be considered when seeking out health care.

Janet Jackson has also been hospitalized after falling ill before a concert.  It looks like a bad start to October for Diva shows.  Let’s hope they both get well and can start putting smiles on our faces again…. Lord knows we need it after loosing money with the market collapsing.

Ok, this stuff normally happens in threes so Madonna you better take care of yourself too!

Gay.com has so much potential to be a good place to chat and hook up and could keep us from having to log into adam4adam, manhunt, dlist, romeo, myspace, facebook, craigslist, and all the other social networking and gay and lesbian hookup sites.  Let this be the change that is needed!!

You will not be able to log into your chat today or check on personals or even view the site while they are upgrading the system.  Although, they claim they will be back shortly there is no real time of when they will return.  This could leave lots of lonely gays and lesbians stranded on a Sunday with nothing to do =)

Dear GAY.COM, PlanetOut.com, and PlanetOutInc.com visitors,

We have a brand new gay.com coming this fall! We’re upgrading chat, adding new features and giving everything a sleek new look.

In order to get there, we’re busy performing a system upgrade right now. We expect to be online shortly. Please check back soon!

In the meantime please visit mr gay.com 2008 and our blogs: Gay TV Blog, Gay Sports Blog, and Behind the WebSite: The GAY.COM Blog.

Premium members: If you have any questions or need to reach our customer care team during this time, please email us at premiumservices@gay.com.

Thanks and we look forward to bringing you a new GAY.COM very soon!

Your friends at GAY.COM, PlanetOut.com and PlanetOutInc.com

The most exciting with the mainstream media of course is Clay Aiken.  Maybe because of that fight on the View? or because of the fact he just looked so gay on American Idol that no one could believe that hes straight no matter what the poor kid tried to do.  Nothing wrong with that Clay we all know your a bottom.

What about Lindsey Lohan coming out?  Well this seems to be timed with her new album coming out soon with a song about being ‘bossy’ or something.  So she is the butch one?  Samantha Ronson might be the bossier one she is the DJ and might like to be more in charge.  Kudos to them for coming out and looking so juicy together.

But what about this latest buzz of a coming out parade going on with the gay blogs and OutQ Sirius radio announcers.  The Yahoo Buzz will be clicking soon like a tap dancer like lesbians on parade when the world finds out that McCain has worked with a gay man for over 17 years.  If Mark Buse is gay it will show hipocracy once again with the McCain Palin ticket.  Everything going on in their campaign is coverups and lies and this is just one of them.

I do not think that people should be outed though.  I feel it is vindictive and no ones business who someone has sex with even if they are in a high office.  This of course unless they are being a hipocrite.  No ones personal lives should be in front of the media or to anyone unless you tell them yourself.

But boy do we have a big story on our hands just in time for national coming out day 2008!

While coming out is nearly always a scary proposition, coming out well after adolescence or college can be especially challenging. Younger people may worry about coming out to family and friends, but as you age, your social ties change. You may have to come out to a spouse, children, and co-workers. Your worries, concerns and questions around coming out may be entirely different than those of a younger person.

Be smart about coming out. Make sure that those closest to you hear from you, and not from the local gossip channel. While you do not need to send your cousin Betty an announcement card, your parents, siblings and closest friends should be told directly. Much of the time, co-workers and your boss can wait. Depending upon your age and social network, you may find that it is more or less accepted. Consider telling a dear, trusted friend early on in the process to have a support system available. You may find that there are those in your life you simply choose not to tell, and this is also valid, especially if they are not apt to hear otherwise.

One of the most difficult situations for gay and lesbian individuals coming out as adults is telling a spouse. Regardless of the stability of your marriage, coming out will pose significant challenges to your marriage and nuclear family. If you have already made decisions about your marriage, you should be open and honest about these with your spouse. You may be unsure about what you want. Consider seeing a therapist experienced in helping couples deal with these transitions. Some people opt to stay in their marriages, acknowledging their sexuality. Others hope for a peaceful dissolution of their marriage.

Telling children also poses a number of challenges. Younger children are typically quite accepting. You may wish to consider becoming active in a local gay and lesbian parenting group to allow your children to see families like yours. Address concerns as they arise and be aware of any possible social issues that may come up for your children. Older children and adult children may feel angry, betrayed or confused. They might also simply have already known or thought they knew. You may find family counseling helpful to smooth over these relationships if need be during this time.

There are some great resources about coming out as an adult, ranging from thirty something to a senior. A recent documentary, Out Late, offers a number of coming out stories from older Americans. More information is available at bulletin.aarp.org/yourworld/reinventing. More tips on coming out in adulthood can be found at sexualityandu.ca/adults/. If you have children, or are the adult child of a gay or lesbian parent, colage.org may be of assistance.

National Coming Out Day is October 11.

I thought this would be a great time to talk about Gay Adoption.

So you’re a grownup now, and mom’s nagging for a grandchild? Perhaps that biological clock is getting louder and louder or you and your partner have simply decided it’s time to bring a child into your family. Without the convenience of compatible biology, adoption is the option chosen by many gay and some lesbian couples. What are the legalities of adoption in your state? What should you know about the adoption process?

The challenges of adopting as a gay couple vary depending upon the state in which you live. In some, you may find that the adoption process, even through the state, is relatively easy. Do keep in mind that in some states, single gay parents can adopt, but the couple cannot adopt. Second parent adoption may be allowed or not. These issues all pose significant challenges to gay individuals. Gaylife.about.com provides a state by state breakdown of adoption laws. Keep in mind that laws do change frequently, and a knowledgeable and friendly social worker can be your best aid in this process.

Adopting through the state foster care system is a popular choice in states that allow this option. This is the most affordable form of adoption, and the child you are adopting often is truly in need of a loving family. You do need to consider your own willingness to adopt an older child, one with special needs, or one of a different race if choosing to adopt through the state.

If you are aiming for a private adoption, you, like any adoptive parents, will need to consider your comfort level with birth parents, and register with an agency in the hopes that a birth mother will choose you as a family for the child she is carrying. Obviously, you should be certain to seek out an agency that welcomes gay adoptive parents.

Today, many heterosexual couples choose international adoption. Unfortunately, this option is only available to gay families if they are willing to be closeted, and adopt from a country that allows for single parent adoptions. If their state then allows it, the second parent may adopt via second parent adoption laws once the international adoption is complete.

As a single parent, a gay individual may use tax credits and deductions afforded by the state and federal governments for adoption; however, as with all things, without the benefit of a marriage license the overall costs for adoption for a gay couple may be higher than they would if for a heterosexual one.

Fall and Winter bring the cold and flu season and you should build up your immune system in advance.  Replace all your sodas with Tea and all your sugary foods with foods that support your system.  Even eating Salmon with Omega 3’s helps out much more then eating Tilapia which has Omega 6’s which are not as beneficial as the 3’s.

Dr. Weil, you know the bearded man that looks damn wise, has came out with an amazing food pyramid.  He wants us to eat 4-5 veggies a day minimum and 4-5 fruits a day.  Veggies I can do since I love salads and tomatoes but not so sure about the fruits but I will try.

I see he is putting the dark chocolate at the top of the food pyramid… reaching for it now.  No really ill set it back down it says sparingly.  Red wine… I hope that Vodka counts some but I am sure it does not.  How about a cup of wine and 4 shots of Vodka and a call to Dr. Weil in the morning?

The Doc mentions Whole Soy foods.  But he points out that you cannot use imitation meats or the isolated soy protein in place of these whole soy foods.  Time to make a trip to Whole foods and figure out what the heck these Whole Soy foods are that are not those.  They are basically Soy Milk or Soy Nuts.

He speaks of Tea and how it reduces inflammation.  The article also notes that people should buy quality tea.  One thing with eating right is buying quality everything.  Maybe purchase it all at Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s to make sure you are getting good foods.  I drink Sweet Leaf Green Tea made in Austin, TX from someones grandmother and sometimes drink Honest Tea White which comes in a quart or something.  You also must correctly brew it if you buy the tea bags to get the health benefits.

My hippie friends will love this.  Dr. Weil says you can eat unlimited shrooms.  This being cooked mushrooms in the variety of wild or Asian.  Hmm I wonder why he stresses not to eat them raw?  I really like portobello mushrooms and he wants us to minimize consumption of these.

The top doctor also recommends brown and wild rice, pasta Al Dente, black beans, and spreads such as hummus.  He also sells his own supplements on the chart consisting of Vitamin C and other nutrients to help you get your numbers higher that day in goodies.

Eating less in inflammatory foods can make you look better with less acne and inflamed skin problems such as eczema or dermatitis.   With that and so many health conditions that can be lessened by eating anti-inflammatory foods then why not?

Gov. Sarah Palin vetoed a bill Thursday that sought to block the state from giving public employee benefits such as health insurance to same-sex couples.

Sen. John McCain’s VP pick Sarah Palin was not exactly backing gay marriage with this veto.  Palin supported the 1998 constitutional amendment on gay marriage.

There are lots of things we do not know about her until the upcoming debates she will have with Joe Biden.  We will learn more then but it does not look like shes much of a gay rights advocate even though she supposedly “has good friends that are gay.”  She still has to keep her day job and I doubt she an keep that Republican name tag if she starts going up against the religious right.

How about this pic on the left of Sarah Palin.  Well actually its an entertainer at Charlie’s Chicago but it sure looks like the VP pick.  The fake Sarah Palin may be more gay rights friendly and be a true maverick.  And why is the VP pick called an Alaskan Maverick anyway? What exactly has she done that she has not flip flopped on - she even flip flopped on the bridge to nowhere!

Although, It has been maybe a year or at least several months since I received an XY Magazine in the mail with a letter attached to it asking for a donation. I think I paid for a subscription to support the magazine as I do many gay magazines (advocate, OUT, Instinct, etc.). You can add Men’s Health, GQ, and Details to the list if you think those are gay.

The problem is that most gay teens in the year 2008 do not know about XY.com or XY Magazine. If you type in gay teen personals into Google you will get an AOL site that comes up first. Then if you type in gay teens in google you get Chadz Boys (chadzboys.com) which offers support and may be a good resource online. ChadzBoys is ranked 324,716 in Alexa above XY which is ranked 352,041.

XY Magazine used to be so popular that you could type in the keyword “XY” or “Gay Teen” and get it to come up in AOL. You know the old software version of AOL that used to bog down your computers that is all but extinct now (just like most magazines and newspapers).

The XY site online says in the title it has been around since 1996 and that is not true. This magazine has been around longer than the AOL Keyword days and we know that was way before 1992. I would just drop the been around since from the title of the site because the youth could care less how long something has been around. They want something that is around now… not a fallen hero.

The fact that About.com (owned by the New York Times), Wikipedia.org, and Student.com own the results in Google for the term “gay teen” that is very sad. It is sad because these are mostly corporate owned companies and not owned by the gay community. Wikipedia is an exception but it should be on page two or so on this term since its a freaking encyclopedia and is NOT a resource for gay teens who are searching for help or comfort online.

The website over at XY.com ask most to be a member before stepping inside then you go inside for non-members and barely see five articles. I mean what kind of resource is this. As for personals, this site is not too bad and its free but cannot compare to myspace or facebook where you get to know quite a bit about anyone before meeting them.

You have to give XY Magazine props because they were able to get themselves seen in bookstores at a time of gays not being accepted. Especially with covers you would see on girl’s teen magazines but aimed at boys and that is just something that does not happen much. So I give credit to Peter Ian Cummings for a job well done back in the day. I just think here in 2008 that XY.com and Gay.com have both lost their ways and lost their focus.

I have been an investor in Planet Out which owns Gay.com and Out Magazine. Jim Cramer a year or two ago talked about Planet Out stock and said they need to make their content free. Well they sort of did but their site is so hard to navigate that it would not even matter. They also set up some blogs and you would think they would be making more money now but I cannot even tell you what their stock price is… my investment was lost from what I can tell or their ticker was changed - I will have to look into that more!

Gay.com should have made chat easier and personals free. Gay.com is not a niche site it is a very popular site that should all be free with advertisements. They could have incorporated the ads on the chat with a better, improved chat but nothing has been improved on that site in several years. I was in Paris and no one was using Gay.com chat they were all using Manhunt and GayRomeo.com.

So those of you asking What Happened to XY Magazine? or Why isn’t anyone on Gay.com personals anymore. It is because the gays youth have went over to the corporate-owned sites such as About.com and Myspace. If you want them then re-invent yourself. Take notes from Madonna bitches because she knows how to reinvent herself!

UPDATE:  I have to give XY Magazine credit for their article on gay teen killing in Iraq.  These kids were 14 years old and killed so cruely and I am so glad that XY Magazine brought this to light.  Iraq and Iran are killing off the most beautiful souls that exist in that tragedy of a place.

If you are still in school, bullying and basic physical safety may be a real concern. Gay and lesbian teens are much more apt to be bullied, and may not find the school administration to be helpful. Webmd.com offers more information on bullying and gay teens. Unfortunately, most of us are aware that bullying often leads to physical violence against GLBTQ teens. More and more schools are working to combat these issues and create a more welcoming environment. If your school has a Gay-Straight Alliance or participates in Day of Silence, dayofsilence.org, activities, these can be a good way to judge the overall environment of the school before coming out.

Coming out to family and friends can range from nerve wracking to devastating. While you should not underestimate the love of your family, assess what you know about their views before coming out. HRC.org offers some great information on coming out to family and friends. You might also consider providing your family with brochures and meeting times for PFLAG, or even just the website link community.pflag.org. If you believe that coming out puts your safety, shelter or emotional health at risk, waiting until you have moved out of your family’s home is valid and reasonable. While we all hope to be able to come out and be accepted, your physical well being may need to be a priority while you are young.

One of the serious issues facing our community is the rate of depression and suicide among gay youth. While it is not surprising that gay and lesbian teens struggle with bullying, acceptance and self acceptance, there is help available. If you have a local gay and lesbian center, they may offer a support group for teens or free confidential counseling. In many cases, if you need a ride or other assistance, they may be able to help. If you are suicidal or in crisis, call Trevor’s Hotline at 866-4-U-TREVOR or online at thetrevorproject.org. Trevor’s Hotline is staffed by trained volunteers and is a 24 hour hotline for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning young people.

Another issue that must be mentioned that effects all young people, but in today’s world of abstinence only sex ed is more critical than ever is just that. If you need honest, clear information about sex, and about sexual issues that impact queer youth, see scarleteen.com or goaskalice.columbia.edu.

Bullying is Still a Problem for Teens

Above you will find some resources for gay youth in time for the Fall school season.  London has many subway ads proclaiming that Being Gay is OK and not to bully.  More ads ran in the US might be useful in buses and subways.  It could be the smaller towns where we see it most and the more black prominent schools have always been worse with bullying even though they are considered a minority.

My solution to most bullying in highschool, middleschool, and elementary is to encourage a mandatory dress system giving students black and white clothes to choose from so you do not have brand bullying.  This would also include certain shoes since shoe brands are a big bullying problem.  Hair should not be mandatory and should be freedom of choice if someone wants to have a mohawk or have pink hair that should be their expression.

Well, you can search around the net of course and see what you can come up with. Let’s try a search with an image search engine, for Olympic Swimmers, and see who was the hottest swimmer at the Beijing Olympics 2008.

Michael Phelps without a doubt. There are hundreds of cool (or I should say ‘hot’) pics of him to be had. I could list hundreds of URLS but that would look unsightly, instead here is my favorite page: squarehippies.com It contains several images of the smooth-skinned hunk and we’re particularly fond of the ones where he wears he swim-shorts very low on his hips, giving us a tantalizing view of the Olympic tattoo. (I know most swimmers shave their chests but do they also shave their pubic hair do you think? Yum.)

(Oops, I was just distracted by a site I found that’s dedicated to hunky sportsmen. Check out fitsportsmen.blogspot.com for sexy muscle guys and hot swimmers.)

Back to Beijing and then off to towleroad.com/michael_phelps. Yes it’s him again, it seems every page that concerns Olympic Swimmers at the moment concentrates on Michael Phelps, and rightly so, he’s done a great job. But this page compares him to the man whose records he beat, Mark Spitz, also sexy in his, now slightly old-fashioned, way. Scroll down that page to find magazine cover shots of more sexy swimmers including Ryan Lochte.

I’m delving further into what folk who post on the Web think is sexy, when it comes to athletes from the Olympic Games – and concentrating on the men. I’m full up with Phelps so am talking generally here. How about the USA Gymnastics team? Six sexy guys including redhead Justin Spring and sexy Alexander Artemev. The official site, usa-gymnastics.org gives you pics and profiles. Or Australian diver Matthew Mitcham? Not only did he have the courage to dive from a 10-metre platform but he also had the courage to come out and declare his homosexuality before competing in the games, the first Australian athlete to do so. And he’s good looking too but hitched, so you can forget snuggling up to his tight, wet body after a quick dip in the pool.

Ok, so we know there are plenty of good looking and naturally fit guys out there getting wet, standing on diving boards or flinging themselves around in a water polo game but what makes them so sexy? Apart from their looks and bodies of course. I reckon it’s what they wear. Swimwear that just about reveals everything when wet, not those all on one body suits, though they can be sexy too. What they wear must be approved months before the games take place. Suits are designed to eliminate drag in the water and there is a debate as to whether swimmers go faster depending on what suit they are wearing. But I think the purpose of a swim-suit isn’t to make the swimmer go faster, it’s to make our pulses race faster, particularly when you have a stunning looking guy stretching on a diving board or bending over on the starting blocks about to dive in. You know he’s going to come out wet with that suit clinging to him…

Oh well, only another four years to wait for the next round of hot Olympian swimmers.

TOO HOT: Be careful searching for Michael Phelps official myspace page. I have seen many phishing sites and fake myspace and facebook pages generated in the searches for the official page. After searching for several minutes I came across what looked like his real myspace but I do not really think it is. We will keep you updated if we find the official or real myspace pages for the hot swimmer.

Remember Frenchie Davis’ adult web site photos? She was booted off the show because of some raunchy pics on the net. Corey Clark spilled the beans on his alleged relationship with Paula Abdul and I couldn’t help noticing from the coverage that he said he was writing a ‘tell-all’ book on the subject. Well, if you can’t get fame one way…

But what’s all this about David Hernandez? This one hadn’t reached me yet so I checked out some of the news sites on the web to get to the bottom of it all. Looks like the 24 year old singer once worked as a stripper in a cabaret bar in Phoenix. ‘Dick’s Cabaret’ was the rather unimaginative name of the place. The manager was reported as saying that David used to lap dance, he had the right look, he stripped, he was good at what he did. So what? Why is there such a fuss about someone taking his clothes off in order to earn cash and bring people pleasure at the same time?

Ah… I see, it was a gay cabaret bar – or at least the clientele were ‘mostly men’. Shock horror indeed that a clean looking guy with good features and a nice voice, competing to get to the top of a TV competition should once have flashed his dick at some guys and had money pushed into his thong. But, as an impartial observer, I don’t think that is what the real outcry was about. I think it was about two things:

One, it was a ‘mainly male’ audience. If he had performed for women I’m sure the ‘scandal’ would have only upped his rating in the show; he’s a pretty good looking guy and I wouldn’t mind seeing him get his kit off. And two, a man who used to strip was allowed to appear on a family show on American TV! ‘How dare they allow such outrage? My children were watching.’ (Moral right shouting from their armchairs here, not me.) According to VoteForTheWorst.com there was a rumor that David also had a boyfriend and they posted pics of him working at a gay nightclub. (‘A gay nightclub!’ Bellows the almost apoplectic old codger from his armchair.) Actually there are some topless pics of him on that site that are with a look but no stripping video or pics yet, shame.

I tried to follow up on the story to see what the outcome was but most ‘news’ sites were simply copying The Associated Press story that first laid down the facts: American Idol contestant once stripped in front of gay men. There was a little more interesting information from the guys at the infamous and alcohol free cabaret bar (voted “best gay male revue” by The Phoenix New Times in 2004). They believed David gave up his job there because of going into the TV show and they also said that he didn’t used to sing in the cabaret. And there the story seems to peter out. Unless you go to the rather excellent MTV site and catch up on all the American Idol news at MTV.com (topics American idol).

So, a storm in a tea cup, or in a thong perhaps? A publicity stunt by the show to boost ratings? Someone trying to stir a little mud? At the end of the day who cares what someone did in their past (as long as it was moral and legal), if the boy can sing let him sing. If he can strip, let him strip. If he can do both at once… Now that would be a reality TV show worth watching.

Only one state, Massachusetts, allows same sex partners to marry, issuing marriage licenses to same sex couples just as they would heterosexual couples. Domestic partnerships and civil unions offering all the rights accorded a married couple under state law are an option in California, New Jersey, Vermont, Connecticut, and New Hampshire. Some legal protections are available as domestic or civil unions without all the protections of heterosexual marriage in Hawaii, Washington, the District of Columbia, and Oregon.

Many states that recognize same sex marriage or unions will recognize those granted in other states. Unfortunately, states without such unions as an option will not legally recognize such a union from another state. Furthermore, twenty-six states have constitutional amendments barring the recognition of same sex marriages, and some forty-three have statutes confining marriage to a relationship between a man and a woman.

Laws regarding same sex marriages and civil unions can impact each of our lives in ways we may not have considered. A Michigan Supreme Court ruling has recently deemed that the state cannot offer benefits to domestic partners in any way because of the state’s constitutional amendment banning recognition of same sex marriages and unions. There is worry that a similar amendment in Florida could create the same legal situation. While some institutions, like the University of Michigan, are responding by creating language that still allows for domestic partner benefits, this is a significant concern for many of us.

What can we expect to see in terms of laws regarding same sex unions in the foreseeable future? As you might imagine, that will largely depend upon the outcome of the 2008 election. Both Democratic candidates oppose same sex marriage, but support civil unions. They do, however, believe it is a matter best left to the states. Barack Obama supports a full repeal of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) while Hilary Clinton only supports a partial repeal. McCain has flip-flopped on gay issues, including civil unions, but does not support a federal ban on gay marriage.

The realities: for a long time to come, unless you’re lucky enough to live coastal or are willing to move, you will be creating the legal aspects of your relationship with durable powers of attorney and commitment ceremonies in front of friends and family. Any hope of widespread legalized same sex unions of any sort is still a long way off.

Can HIV Be Destroyed?

The premise of Gimme Sugar is simple. A group of twenty-something women in L.A.’s lesbian club scene are working to launch and promote their own club night in this competitive market. Not surprisingly, this isn’t exactly a drama free undertaking, and there are break ups and make ups, fights and friendships.

Any reality show is only as good as the cast. If you don’t care about the lives of the people on the show, you simply will not care about the show itself. Fortunately, it’s quite easy to get wrapped up in the lives of Charlene, Alex, Robin, Sayeh, Davonee, and Bathilda. Charlene is the manager of the Truck Stop and one of the minds behind the L.A. lesbian club scene. L.A. just wouldn’t be L.A. without those looking for the spotlight, and Alex and Davonee are both hoping for that spotlight. Sayeh and Robin are both new to the club scene in Los Angeles, and Sayeh is new to the group of friends. Bathilda is the hit of the club scene, both gay and straight.

Is this deep and life changing television? Well, no…but it is a fun summer romp. There are some great things about this little show. First, the women are all friends in real life, who started their venture to offer the underage Alex a chance to go clubbing with all the rest. It’s racially diverse, offering young women of color a chance to see media images that look like them reflected in this show. It features a gay-positive social environment and network, and presents an image of successful and happy young queer women. Nothing is perfect, however, and the show does often reflect the biphobia of our community in the women’s critical interactions with bisexual Alex. It is, fundamentally, just another show in this genre, this one just happens to have young lesbians as its cast.

This new reality show airs on LOGO on Mondays at 10:00 PM with regular re-airings throughout the week. The six episode season will wrap up soon, but it’s sure to be replayed if you have missed it. You can also find episodes online at logoonline.com , as well as recaps available at afterellen.com.

GLBT folk are appearing on more and more reality shows, ranging from major network offerings to shows on more typically gay friendly networks like LOGO and Bravo. In fact, if you are looking for out GLBTQ individuals, you are far more apt to find them on reality television than on the scripted sort. There is never a shortage of drama, whether the cast is gay or straight, so if you need mindless summer entertainment on a hot evening, Gimme Sugar may be just what you need.

My favorite show on LOGO happens to be Sordid Lives.  They recently did a series with Beth Grant, Rue McClanahan, and Leslie Jordan.  Leslie Jordan was even in drag dressed up as Tammy Wynette.  I think Sordid Lives will be the hit TV show that LOGO is looking to win the TV ratings battle!

One of the best options for political action this year is to work locally. Working locally is often more motivating, more relevant and can allow you network within your community. You may find that there is a local political group that works specifically on GLBT issues and this can be a good jumping off point. Local activities sponsored by moveon.org can be another possibility within your community. You can also find information about the local organizations for the Democratic Party at democrats.org/local . Conveniently, working with these sorts of organizations on a local level can help you to stay informed about issues that may matter within your community specifically. Often, local organizations need help on the phones, in person, or even with tasks you may be able to work on from home when you have time.

If you live in a small town, are short on time or simply are looking for other options for political activity, there are some great possibilities for GLBTQ individuals. First, sign up for moveon.org to stay informed about political issues. You may even want to donate money if you are able. The Victory Fund at victoryfund.org is another possibility, whether you are looking for political information or would like to offer help to GLBT candidates. Stonewalldemocrats.org is another good source for information and another possibility in terms of donation, fundraising and political action. You may be surprised to find that even in a smaller community you can find ways you can take action, share your views and more.

Stay apprised of the issues in your community and the nation as a whole to make good choices with your time, money, and eventually your vote. Research the candidates and issues thoroughly, take the time to talk to candidates whenever you are able, and make your vote based on who you believe will act to the benefit of the GLBT community. When all else fails, vote for the candidate who will not promote or support legislation harmful to our community.

What issues are you for or against in this presidential campaign? For higher taxes, lower taxes, or a fairer taxing system?  Ending the War in Iraq with Obama or 100 years more of war with McCain?  Politics as usual with McCain? Gay Marriage and Gays in the Military are also some of the issues surrounding the 2008 campaign.

You may also want to examine local issues in some counties where you could be voting on things such as liquor drinking rights, judges, and house property taxes.

As if people do not know how to pull their pants down and look thuggish in the back.  Now we need to buy jeans that sag in the rear for us?  It is a hot look but its about time for something else I would think.  I am ready for Jnco’s to come back again because they were so fun to dance in but not the full bell bottoms but more width at the bottom of jeans.  I wished they would quit making jeans so skinny near the ankles.

At first I thought they had accidentally sent me three of the same emails but I guess their marketing department is kind of lazy that they sell the same fashion in the abercrombie kids, Abercrombie and Fitch, and Hollister.  I am not sure why they sent me the smaller a email and I am glad they did not bother to send out a Ruehl today as well I think I got that last week.

But get ready because the new line of back to school starts up this week in all the malls and you will be bombarded with desperate retailers trying to earn your money in a weak economy.   Summer is quickly coming to an end with possible tax free days to shop even if you are not in school.  If I recall AnF was one of the one retailers who did well during the last dot com bust.  They were too HOT to turn down.

Well here we have the different guys in jeans.  The classic Abercrombie is the most seductive with some bare buns showing and the nice V shaped bod showing off the smooth way down to the belt.  The abercrombie denims look more like Jesse McCartney just turned around doing his foot fetish thing again - of course most of their models geared at kids are really like 18.

The Hollister Co. models are strutting some chiseled abs but they are too cool to be in real color because you know they are surfer dudes.  It almost looks more like some wild west shootout than an ad for jeans.  You notice how the boxers go up above the hump on one side and the pants somehow always stay on completely.  We need to work on getting them off a little more.

A casual party can be a great summer choice. Backyard barbeques around the grill are a traditional choice or a pool party if you have one. You might also consider hosting a get together or family reunion at a local lake. You should always keep the temperature in mind, and make certain to provide plenty of cool drinks and shade for an outdoor summer party. A good host will also make certain sunscreen and bug repellent are available. Water safety is an important consideration, especially if children will be attending. Old fashioned summer lawn games can be a fun choice, including options like croquet and badminton. You might consider a sprinkler for the kids for a family friendly event, but do be prepared to have towels and fresh clothes handy for your small guests.

More formal events are common in the summer as well. You may find yourself planning a summer wedding or a baby shower, an afternoon tea or even a formal evening dinner party. Cabanas, gazebos or other shelter, possibly even a large tent for a major occasion, can make the day a lot more pleasant. Formal events in the summer may require extra attention to be certain that your food, centerpieces and decorations can stand up to the heat.

Food is the center of nearly every party. Planning smart summer food for your event or party will help to make sure everyone enjoys themselves. Food should be heat tolerant for outdoor events, seasonal, fresh and plentiful. The summer barbeque is a traditional choice, but cold salads, an array of fresh, light appetizers, or dishes that make the most of fresh, seasonal foods are ideal. For a relaxed casual meal, consider making gourmet burgers or allowing everyone to grill their own shish kabobs. Easy food is often some of the best in the summer. Sales in local stores can allow you to keep your party cost effective, or for a casual family party, consider making it potluck.

Whether you plan a quiet adults only dinner party in the garden or a loud and playful family barbeque, summer entertaining is always fun. Make a pitcher of homemade cherry limeade, iced tea, or margaritas and enjoy spending time with friends and family.

Often LGBTQ individuals are best represented in reality TV. Networks like Bravo have made shows from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy to Project Runway popular. Recent casts from shows like Top Chef and even CBS’s Survivor have included people who were open about their sexuality. While these shows offered positive representations, others are perhaps slightly more embarrassing, including MTV’s Tila Tequila dating show. LOGO has even recently produced a show featuring Calpurnia Addams, a transwoman looking for love. Programming aimed at the GLBTQ community is offered by the LOGO network and here! TV network. 

Comedies, dramas and other shows, both on air and off, also feature GLBTQ characters. Some of the best are no longer on the air, but included cable shows like Showtime’s Queer as Folk and HBO’s Six Feet Under. Other shows that included great representations of characters and relationships are Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Ellen, and Will and Grace. Showtime’s the L-Word, one of the few shows on TV with a cast of largely lesbian characters is slated for another season. ABC is in the lead as far as characters representing the gay community, especially with shows like Ugly Betty. Ugly Betty features a transgendered female character in a lead role, as well as gay characters in supporting roles.

Documentaries, political commentaries and witty stand up comedy can all be found on LOGO and Bravo, but less commonly on mainstream networks. You will find that more and more networks are making some programming available online, either for free or for a fee with a service like ITunes.

There are some great media resources online if you’d like to keep an eye on possible new happenings in GLBTQ friendly television. Afterellen.com offers a regular look at lesbian and bisexual women’s concerns in mass media, including television and film. After Elton offers a similar perspective with regard to the media and gay and bisexual men. These sites are both entertaining and informative, and may help to turn you on to new queer friendly programming, whether you’re looking for a ridiculous romp in Dante’s Cove or great and serious programming in a drama show.

It is too bad to see one less big pharma involved in saving HIV related deaths.  Let’s hope this brings opportunity to smaller pharma and something positive comes out of this in some way.

As for those drugs in human studies, the closest to approval is rilpivarine (TMC-278), an NNRTI for first line treatment being studied against Sustiva. Vicriviroc, Schering’s CCR5 drug, continues to flounder but is still viable. Bevirimat, a maturation inhibitor from Panacos, has been hamstrung by formulation problems. Other drugs we are following are Pharmasset’s racivir, and Avexa’s apricitabine.

The article points to the fact that we need more treatment activists who can work with scientists, companies, and regulators.  This will call more action to more HIV drugs being in the pipeline and hopefully be approved if they are safe.

We need more programs in colleges and more gay community focused on science and getting more involved with the research.  I think alot more can be done to further the HIV research programs and focus on a cure.  As a community effort more money could be given to research and science and/or the treatment activists.  Their could be a crisis ahead if we stop being persistant and pushing for a better treatment or a cure.

I used to watch ATWT with my mother growing up at lunch time every day during school break and really got attached and addicted to some of the characters.  I would have loved to have a Luke on back when I watched the show.  It seemed most gay guys ran off or committed suicide on these shows back then.  Now they are getting more accepted even that pop stars are coming by to help out with their roles.

She sung the new song “into the night” which is  a fun dance song played at many video bars and clubs.  Then she did “true colors” and donated that to Luke and his boyfriend on the show.  It was really touching to see this on daytime tv.

Here is the video from ATWT.  If you have not seen the True colors tour with Cyndi Lauper then you must go see it.  It’s a fairly cheap concert and it supports the HRC and the performers were all spectacular.

This time may be a big diffferent with Britney trying to make a comback her mentor could be lending her a helping hand that really could make her respected again in the music industry.  She could do some opening acts or show up a few shows that are being filmed for HBO or even MTV.  I doubt Britney will be in every show but I bet she could appear in the ones that will be the biggest ones.

You can also expect a big surprise of some sort at this years MTV VMA’s or will Madonna throw anything towards the ratings of the VMA’s since they barely play videos on there anyway.  She will probably save her big concert push for her shows and not deal with the VMA’s but we may find out soon because they air this year on September 7th at 7pm.

The 25th year of the MTV VMA’s will take place at Paramount Studios in Hollywood, CA on movie sets instead of the traditional NYC theatre or the MIAMI AA Center or the Vegas Palms.  You can already start making your predictions now for the the 2008 award show but I am betting on a performance from Madonna, Justin, Britney, and you might even see Michael Jackson come out of hiding for this event!

Madonna’s Sticky & Sweet starts up in Europe in October.

How about this for a trip to remember: Machu Picchu, Peru. There is more to this wonder of the new world than the Inca settlement in the clouds, though that in itself is a sight to see. In the town of Machu Picchu there is a hotel, the Inkaterra Machu Picchu. Set in the cloud forest this hotel features individual cabins with open fires and a first class service. There are over 1,000 species of orchids in the grounds plus a bear (release to the wild) sanctuary. But the reason I mention this place is because they can also arrange a blessing, at night around a fire, with a local Shaman. You can have your relationship blessed by the mountains, sky and earth, in traditional Inca language and style. To find out more about this trip visit Amro Holidays who specialise in gay and lesbian adventures around the world. amroholidays.com

Perfectgayhoneymoons.co.uk is another good site to search out and browse through if you are looking for ideas; they can arrange civil partnerships as well as honeymoons. Some of their suggestions include: Australia, The Caribbean and places in Europe. Greece is on their list and what could be more romantic than walking on golden sand along the shores of the Aegean where Homer sang and Odysseus sailed. Greek hospitality is known throughout the world and recently the country conducted its first civil partnership, same-sex wedding on the small island of Tilos. Nearby is the island of Symi, neo-classical in design and unspoiled this is one of the most romantic islands in the Aegean. (www.symidream.com/wp)

According to a planetout.com survey, most people they asked said they would like to visit Hawaii after their civil ceremony and wander the beaches, feel the balmy breeze in their hair and take in the beautiful scenery. The Maldives are another out of the way place to be perfectly alone, in your own cabin over the crystal clear water; just you and your partner and the sound of the sea.

Of course, you may wish to tailor your honeymoon to your preferred hobby or lifestyle: Clubbers go to the Canary Islands or Ibiza, Mykonos or London. Those who like to really chill could find hazy happiness in Amsterdam and for those for who trust is more important than monogamy there is Berlin with its late night bars, night-spots and fetish clubs. All of these places have sights to see, history and museums too so you could combine a cultural visit with some romantic dining, maybe on a canal boat in Holland or on the boulevards of Paris.

The world really is your oyster but there are things to consider other than romance. Gay and lesbian couples want to feel safe when they travel and just because your country allows civil partnerships doesn’t mean that you will be welcomed everywhere in the world. Don’t be afraid to check with your Foreign Office as to where is currently safe for same sex couples to be and take sensible precautions when out and about in public, sadly these still include visible signs of affection in many places.

But, at the end of the day, the choice is yours. In a recent poll by a gay holiday company the top destinations were:

Sydney, Australia (Mardi Gras, flights over Sydney harbour, the lonely outback…)
Rio de Janeiro (Carnival, beaches, clubs…)
San Francisco (Gay history, the bridge, the romantic hills…)
Mykonos, Greece (Sun, sea and… Well, I’ll leave the rest up to your imagination.)

Happy Pride to everyone celebrating this weekend in Oklahoma City and those next weekend in San Francisco and New York City among many others!

You may be pleasantly surprised by how many wedding vendors are happy to work with you and your partner as you plan your special day. You may even want to visit a local wedding fair or exhibition or speak to local wedding planners if you are considering having a larger ceremony and reception. Gayweddings.com is one source for planning information, vendor suggestions and more when you are beginning to plan your commitment ceremony or wedding. A site like this can also help you find wedding cake toppers, invitations and other accoutrements specifically suited to same sex ceremonies.

Keep in mind that your ceremony and reception can be as traditional or not as you prefer. You may want to choose a beautiful outdoor location, a restaurant or hotel, or a church if you participate regularly. Several denominations are typically willing to celebrate same sex unions, including the Unitarian church, United Church of Christ and Episcopalians. If you prefer a church wedding, one of these may be an option. Most secular locations will welcome you, and you will also find that many wedding chapels in liberal areas are happy to celebrate same sex relationships.

You may also be concerned about finding a GLBTQ friendly place to honeymoon with your partner. Gay.com/travel/article.html?sernum=8651 offers some tips on planning your honeymoon, as well as specific suggestions. You will also find that many all inclusive resorts are lesbian and gay friendly, and some, like Beaches even include the ceremony in your honeymoon package if you prefer a private commitment option.

A number of wedding sites aimed at younger, free thinking couples will also welcome same sex couples. Take a look at Offbeatbride.com and indiebride.com for further wedding ideas. You might also want to explore the offerings at etsy.com for invitations, RSVP cards, and even cake toppers and wedding rings. Attire can be a challenge, but consider choosing wedding outfits that suit both of your personalities and mesh well with one another without matching. You may even want to consider a period wedding or one with a theme to share an interest and shared hobby with your guests.

And congrats to California couples that finally get the chance to wed!  I never thought I would see the day I would be putting another category that said ‘wedding’ instead of ‘dating’.  I decided to call it ‘love’ since wedding sounded strange for a category.  Love is the strongest word I can use.

Shelter offers a refreshingly well done look at two surfers falling in love. This gay romance is a coming out movie, but without the gay bar drama, HIV scares and other issues that mark many such films. It’s simply a story of first love, acted and written well. The trailer, and more information on Shelter, can be found at http://www.heretv.com/sheltermovie/.

Faith Akin’s The Edge of Heaven is, at its core, an east-meets-west story; however, the couple at the core of it is a lesbian couple. This multi ethnic couple is not central to the story because of their sexuality, but simply their love story and their struggles over borders and politics.

If you enjoy foreign films, the 2008 release of The Bubble may appeal. This is also a love story marked by political divisiveness. In this Hebrew film directed by Eytan Fox, the bubble of life as one of the hip in Tel Aviv bursts when Noa meets the Palestinian Ashraf and they fall in love.

Zero Chou’s Spider Lilies is another viable option for those looking for a DVD to add to their on-line queues this summer. The Taiwanese Spider Lilies is a drama, with a lesbian love story intertwined into slightly surreal cinematography. While its official release was 2006, it played at this year’s London Lesbian and Gay Film Festival.

In fact, the London Gay and Lesbian Film Festival can be a good source for movie possibilities. View the list of films shown at http://www.bfi.org.uk/llgff/all_films_showing. While many of these are not new releases, perhaps you’ll see a movie or two that you have previously overlooked and find new favorites. For newer releases, see http://heretv.com/AFilmsPage.php as a possible source of what you might watch on DVD or even in your local indie theater. The LOGO owned afterellen.com and afterelton.com are a consistently good source for information about what’s going on of interest to LGBTQ individuals in the media, including books, television and movies.

If you are looking for a good overall list of recommended gay and lesbian literature, take a look at jclarkmedia.com/gaybooks/recommended.html for a fairly comprehensive list. You might also check out afterellen.com/books for reviews of books with lesbian themes, and afterelton.com/books for books with gay themes. You might also review past winners of the Stonewall Book Award. While not specifically gay and lesbian oriented, many avid readers have happily taken on the challenge presented in Peter Boxall’s 1001 Books You Must Read Before You Die. Either of these can be a good start, particularly if you prefer your summer reading on the heavier side of things.

Some of the best possibilities for summer reading are not specifically queer themed, but are great new novels on the market. You should be able to find these in your local bookshop without difficulty, and enjoy them whether you are at home or traveling this summer. These range from novels of serial killers to young adult fantasy, from vampire stories to travel writing.

Tom Rob Smith’s Child 44 is a story of a serial killer in Stalinist Russia, and is receiving broad accolades, both from the literary community and readers as a whole. If you are of a more romantic bent, Salman Rushdie’s new Enchantress of Florence brings to life the world of renaissance Italy. Since some of us admittedly enjoy our summer reading on the lighter side, Stephenie Meyer’s new novel in the Twilight series, The Host is receiving good reviews. Christopher Paolini’s new addition to the Eragon trilogy is also due out for an early summer release.

What am I reading this summer? I suspect I’ll reread the classic Rubyfruit Jungle, and read for the first time John Barrowman’s autobiography Anything Goes, Jennifer Harris’ Pink, and Sarah Schulman’s The Child. I’d like to squeeze in Sarah Waters’ The Night Watch and finally, with some guilt that I haven’t read them before, take on Armistead Maupin’s Tales of the City. I have no doubt I’ll sneak a few other books in under the wire as well while I retreat to the comfort of air conditioning on hot summer days.

Cruises are popular options across the board, and you will find a number of options directly geared to the gay community. These range from singles cruises to couples options, and even cruises for gay parents and their children. Gay.com Cruises section offers a thorough list of gay cruising options, ranging from small and romantic cruises to party ships that are great fun for a cruise with friends. Research the cruise options available to find the one right for you and your traveling companions.

If you’re looking for a beach getaway, you’ll be pleased to know that many resorts are openly welcoming and gay friendly. The Sandals resorts now welcome same sex couples after a policy change in 2004, and many resorts actively court the GLBTQ community. Club Med also welcomes both gay couples and families. Gay.com also offers a list of the best gay resorts in the business, but do keep in mind some may not be ideal for families traveling with kids in tow, and this particular list is geared toward men.

If you’re looking for a big celebration and socialization, you have a number of options. GayDays in Orlando is one, with the chance to party and hang out at Disney and other theme parks. The Dinah Shore weekend in Palm Springs draws lesbians from across the country for dancing, days at the pool, concerts and stand up comedy. Pride celebrations across the country, particularly in San Francisco and New York City also draw travelers from the GLBTQ community.

Several resort towns are especially known as meccas of GLBTQ culture. Provincetown, MA is at the top of this list. Fire Island, New York and Key West, Florida come in close behind. Palm Springs, CA is also popular gay destination, with great resorts and wonderful hiking opportunities. Great gay friendly beaches, art galleries and clubs all make these great destinations if you’re looking to relax with your partner or perhaps meet someone new. Families will find that Disney’s theme parks are always welcoming, even if the gay resort towns have somewhat less for them.

The new R&B Pop album from Jesse McCartney is titled Departure featuring Leavin’ from the singer that brought us Beautiful Soul a few years ago where he was shirtless in the video as well. Jesse McCartney recently turned 21 and is in the video with Niki Huey who keeps showing off her feet for the camera. I take it Jesse has a foot fetish and maybe Niki does too. It showed his feet a few times and hers several times.

Jesse has starred in Summerland, the TV series and many movies and Disney shows including Hannah Montana. He was even on All My Children as Adam Chandler, Jr. If you want more on the sexiest man alive (or twink) you can check out jessemac.com or his myspace.com/JesseMcCartney.

Jesse McCartney resembles Leonardo DiCaprio when he was younger around the time he was in that Beach movie. This is definately the hottest I have seen him. You sort of see him shirtless from behind but you get the tease of seeing his shirt unbuttoned and the girls pants are unbuttoned while they are starring at each other in this lustful video.

Dolly claimed she was in shock when she heard of the parody and hurt he would do such a thing. Although, the publicity may end up helping them both. I don’t think Stern knows that he should not mess with this Southern gal. She will come after him! She is definately one of the sweetest and more real celebs you will ever see.

On the same topic, Dolly just finished her concert tour for Backwoods Barbie and it was a great show. I had a chance to see it last weekend and it was great to see her and all of her jokes in between songs. Many of the jokes were boob-related… imagine that! They did not allow cameras in the concert or I would have some to show you. I really enjoyed the older videos of her concerts in the background during a few of the songs.

Here is the video of the audio clip parody from shock jock Howard Stern:

While many in California and the nation are celebrating that gays can now marry in the state. Their is a possible backlash in the November election. Anti-gay groups such as Focus on the Family have gathered signatures to put the gay marriage issue on the November ballot. This could not only hurt the chance of Democrats in the white such as the stolen Bush election 7 years ago but it could overturn the Supreme court decision based on the constitution.

California’s secretary of state is expected to rule near the end of June whether the activists gathered enough signatures to put the gay marriage amendment on the ballot. Right wing groups are building up a 10 million dollar bomb to throw towards the November ballot issue. The National Organization for Marriage’s own web site is calling on their supporters to give $10 million so they can pollute the state with anti-gay messages in months ahead.

VoteYesMarriage.com, who seek to to amend the California Constitution to ban gay marriage are saying that the decision today is a bad role model for children to follow but they are not thinking of the basic rights of other tax paying humans sharing the planet with them. Same sex couples pay taxes and we have the right to marry just like your families and your kids.

What can you do to help? Donate to the Human Rights Campaign (hrc.org) or get a card that helps these causes just by making everyday purchases.

You can also take in any of Orlando’s other attractions while at Gay Days, and the location, the Regal Sun Resort, is conveniently close to Disney and other Orlando fun. You’ll even find activities for children at Gay Days in Orlando, making this a good choice for queer families. Girls’ Days is being billed as a kid friendly event, so if you have considered a Disney vacation, perhaps this is the time to take it. Your kids are sure to especially treasure the memory of a Disney visit during this time, since they can become one of the crowds of kids with two moms or two dads.

There are several special Girls’ Days events planned. These include daily pool parties at the host hotel, a lesbian comedy show featuring Susan Westenhoefer and others, vendor fairs, and a great retro dance party aimed at the girls. Staying at the Regal Sun Resort will allow you to meet and greet other women from all over the country and the world who have come out to enjoy Girls’ Days at Gay Days.

You may also want to check out some of the other Gay Days events not specifically associated with Girls’ Days. All Gay Days events welcome both men and women, so you might enjoy taking in the Miss Gay Days pageant, wine tastings, or buy tickets for Gay Days at Disney World. You’ll also find other theme parks welcoming the gay community during Gay Days.

Pack up a red shirt and head for Gay Days. Whether you are traveling with your family or alone, a full schedule of pool parties (might need a new swimsuit), fun and new friends awaits you in Orlando.

The New York Times did an elaborate piece on the young couple. It also talked about how MTV did a show on a set of male and female couples from Massachusetts. Good Stuff. Read more about it here.

When most of us just paid our high tax bills we looked around and wondered if we get anything out of our payments to the government. Gay Marriage is a start to getting the benefits in life we deserve and the love that the straights can cherish.

When you start the registration process at GayRomeo.com you actually get four options. You can register as a user (I’ll come back to that in a moment) or you can register as a club. Doing that will let you set up a different kind of profile and create your own on-line community; a great way to find other folk with the same interests as you. If you are a business you can register to be in the guide and if you are an escort you can also set up a professional profile and, as far as I could see, all of these options were free.

I tried out the basic, personal registration process and found it quite a long one. There are certain things you have to fill out before you can proceed but the site will tell you if anything is missing. It’s always best to be thorough with these things anyway as you only want to attract the right guys. There’s no point saying you are hung like a horse and have the body of a porn star if you don’t – you’ll only disappoint people and get a bad name. Also, take a moment to work out your ‘handle’ or profile name. Things like S2***drt7 are not only hard to remember but meaningless.

Once you get your log in details and your registration is confirmed you can start to upload images. The users console in quite neat and easy to use but there are lots of different options to experiment with. Across the top you have links to shops, the info zone where there is all kinds of useful info including tips on how to design your profile and safe sex information too. There are really friendly help and support pages plus the ‘about’ page where you are introduced to the team behind the site. Then you come to the users search engine and I guess this is where you’ll want to start. There are seven kinds of search already picked out for you and these include your area under their headings, so for example you can see who in your area has images, you can find recently registered users from your area and so on. Of course you can search for other locations too and even by name, age and the usual dating site options apply here.

At the bottom of your screen the options continue and you can check messages, view clubs, change your profile and update any number of settings to aid your viewing. It looks like Gay Romeo has thought of just about everything and, when you register, you really do get the feeling that you are joining something special. The design is cool with neat images and clear text and you can even instantly change the language of the site into one of six European languages.

I have seen quite a few of what I call dating sites recently and they each have their own style of presentation but, so far, Gay Romeo is my favorite for Europe. There really is too much on it to tell you about here so I can only suggest you pop over and have a look. It’s free to register and use so you’ve got nothing to lose. It’s new and fresh and offers a good hook-up, chat and general on-line community for you to become a part of.

If you have not been to the Oaklawn gayborhood of Dallas you may not know they are hiding some of the nation’s biggest hot spots. A few of the Caven owned clubs in Dallas have the theme of that soap opera “Dallas” with Sue Ellen as the lesbian bar and JR’s as the gay pub. You cannot blame them for naming them these names because they are sexy names and do stick out. I just wonder how many straight people pull up wondering if they can buy souvenirs from the soap opera.

Sue Ellen’s recently closed down to re-open at its new location which used to be TMC a.k.a. Throckmorton Mining Company (located just behind Throckmorton and Cedar Springs). TMC used to be a hole-in-the-wall bar stuck behind JR’s that was known for being dark and mysterious. A few Republican senators probably hung out in the closet inside there somewhere. TMC remodeled several years back which was good for awhile but now things have changed and its time for Sue Ellen’s to break out with its new mega-club.

You certainly cannot call this a bar anymore. Sue Ellen’s has grown up into a mega-club with a bigger dancefloor, huge upstairs with a live band area, and all-new lipstick lounge that is modern and sleek. Make sure you arrive early on Saturday nights because there is normally a line outside since everyone wants in the newest club opening. The upgrade is definitely 2 times bigger and 2 times hotter than the old version.

Now if they can only do something with JR’s the block will have all new clubs. I have been told they will someday connect all of the clubs so you can pay one admission to get in Station 4 and Sue Ellen’s and this may be the first step in that direction. If you like specials you may want to check out their website at Caven.com for the Cruisin The Crossroads schedule. The times are from 9:30pm to 10pm on Fridays and Saturdays for No Cover and $2 Well Drinks and move on to the other clubs. Below are some live bands coming and some pics from the new lesbian mega-club.

LIVE BANDS and Coming Events at Sue Ellen’s Nightclub:

• May 1 - Creme Girlee
• May 2 - Ya! Ya
• May 5 - Cinco de Mayo Celebration
• May 8 - Izzy Scott
• May 9 - Girl in a Coma
• Prom 2008 - Friday, May 16

Russia, China, the United States are just a few of the nations that have to constantly do research on war programs for protection. The pentagon has admitted many programs that use biological warfare after sometime. Some may even be needed to protect the U.S. in case some country decides to do the same. But this could just possibly be a case of an experiment gone wrong. It could also be many other factors.

I normally always question things such as who owns the drink sites that tell you that drinking corn syrup really is not that bad for you? hmm maybe Coca-Cola. It was on the main page of Yahoo.com one day advertising and at the time it did not have anything that resembled Coke on the site until I researched it. It now has a semi-Coke looking label. A web page owned and created by Coke called the Beverage Institute for Health and Wellness.

My point is that questions need to be asked sometimes.

I do not really see any gay blogs talking about this issue that Rev. Wright brings up. Sometimes it seems that the GLBT overall is scared to speak up about HIV/AIDS and just submit to "tests" every time they are told with no questions asked. With full trust of everyone involved for some reason even though we are the most discriminated group known to mankind.

Above is Hillary making a good point from a YouTube video. Rev. Wright may be on the racist side of things but he may have a point that needs to be looked into further. Not just blacks but gays and blacks could have been the target.

There are sites online such as EATG.org that point out some interesting details that never make it to the big media:

But an adviser to WHO who disclosed the problem, told The Times ‘I thought it was just a coincidence until we studied the latest findings about the reactions which can be caused by Vaccinia. Now I believe the smallpox vaccine theory is the explanation to the explosion of AIDS." the article stated, adding, "The greatest spread of HIV infection coincides with the most intense immunization programme… The article said about 14,000 Haitians who were involved in the vaccination program then brought the disease home to the Caribbean.

The literature on this site brings up thoughts that Smallpox, Hepatitis B, and Syphilis "vaccines" or experiments or tests could all be part of the main problem. I am not a doctor I just found it really interesting. I would like to know what the people over at theBody.com have to say about it.

Of course we have all heard about the Tuskegee experiment where black patients who were never told they had Syphilis all eventually died untreated. This went on for forty years with African-Americans in the medical community not saying a word.

Not saying I agree with all of this… Just saying some things need to be evaluated.

These are two separate giveaway offers but I thought I would mention them both in the same post since they are Diva related giveaways. One of the offers the Kylie Minogue promoter is giving away on our site and all you have to do is make a comment on our site about your favorite Kylie Minogue experience.

This is a promotion for the US release of Kylie Minogue’s new album ‘X’, which is already certified platinum in the U.K. and Australia. To qualify for this contest you just comment below and that could include a favorite song and how it made you feel or a concert moment with the Diva. We will pick from the best comment below and send you a prize pack from the promoter which includes:

The prize pack includes the U.K. Enhanced CD single of “2 Hearts”, stickers, poster, and postcards. If you are a true Kylie fan this is a great prize pack and we are excited we can offer this.

We will decide the winner on April 29th and email you from the email you use on the comment form. Please make sure you use an email we can contact you to mail out this prize pack. We will not sign you up for any other offers nor will we sell your email to any lists. There are no strings to this offer it’s basically to promote the new album from Kylie Minogue which includes these hot songs to show you a few: “2 Hearts” / “Like A Drug” / “In My Arms” / “Speakerphone”.

Madonna Concert In NYC from VH-1

Yes, you also heard me right about a Madonna Concert. You have the chance to win Madonna Concert tickets for her performance in New York City at a small upclose venue. All you have to do is write a 4 line poem on the VH-1 website and they will pick from thousands of those entries.

You just need to goto MadonnaTickets.VH1.com to get a chance to see Madonna at the Roseland Ballroom on April 30th. The folks over at the VH1 website will decide on two poet winners on April 24 and contact them by the address they use in the contact form.

Note: We do not have any relation with the Madonna Concert giveaway. A representative from We do have the right to terminate this contest or refuse an winner if something comes up out of our control.

Read more about the new Madonna release here. You can view the Myspace of Kylie Minogue at myspace.com/kylieminogue or Official site at kylie.com. Keep in mind that you have big odds of winning the Kylie prize pack here so please give us some comments and lets get this going.

Kylie Minogue shows no signs of slowing down in 2008. She began the year being honored by the Queen with an OBE (Order of the British Empire) for her services to music, and has already earned a host of honors for X, including a BRIT Award for “Best International Female Solo Artist.” In May, she will hit the road for a three-month, 50-date European tour, entitled KYLIE X 2008.

But what exactly is Gay Vox? Well, actually it’s several things. It’s a news and information centre for all things French and gay and worldwide and gay, it’s a guide to gay France, it’s a dating site and it’s a discussion board too. And all around the edges of all of that are interesting advertisements, galleries, links and snippets of information about gay lifestyle and health. Let’s start at the home page and work our way through:

On the home, ‘news’, page you are asked to log in, but this is not compulsory. You can still enjoy the site without being a member but signing up is free so you have nothing to lose by joining. As a member you will be able to see a little bit more and search for sexy French guys and girls looking for dates and chat, join in the forums and so on. There is also a search box for ‘Recontres’, which is what I would call ‘personals’, using this brings up pages of guys who are registered on the site but for a more detailed search there is a ‘Recontres’ section. Check the rest of the page before moving on and you’ll find links to various other sites and pages on a variety of themes: gay culture, news, articles, travel, shopping and health.

The next page along the top menu brings you a searchable database of events in and around France. Click the map to select your area and up comes the list of places, times and dates. This is a great function of you are going on holiday or taking a business trip to France; there is a drop down list where many of the themes are similar to the English: Sex-parties, Naturisme and Clubbing for example – simply choose what you’re looking for and click the area of the map you are visiting and there’s your list of things to do all laid out for you.

A more in depth description of what’s hot and what’s going on in the country can be found on the Guide page which again is image driven with a more detailed map. You could use the Forums to get into discussions about places to go and things to see, though you will probably need to read and write some French to do this. Or you could search out guys or gals near to your destination by using the personals part of the site.

Whether you speak French or not you should be able to find your way through Gay Vox and enjoy what it has to offer. The registration form is straightforward and if there are any words that don’t look familiar (many English words come from French so you may be surprised at how easy it is to follow) you could try using an on-line translator to help you along. One final thing to note, the personals database covers the entire world and not just France and French speaking countries so you are bound to find new friends who understand your language and who may even help you learn theirs. Like I said Gay Vox has become very popular very quickly and it’s easy to see why, even for non French speakers it’s a great site to visit.

The bottom line is you can basically Travel to France without being there and feel there culture.  If you have trouble with translating this site then download the Google Toolbar and just rightclick and that is the easiest way to see things in English or whichever language you prefer. You may also try Worldlingo.com which has a URL translation for pages of a site. You may also just have Google do it for you manually.

The law says that anyone promoting “extreme thin” including websites, fashion magazines, and advertisers will be committing an illegal crime.  So you can be as fat as a mountain but have limits on how thin you can be.  This is discrimination and I hope the French Senate will not allow this to pass through.

There are so many reality shows making people eat excessive foods then you have your model shows where they diet some.  I think people know their limits they can overly commit themselves and there does not need to be a law telling someone how much weight they can gain or loose.

What’s next are they going to outlaw Diet cola?  I mean how can they tell when someone is overly thin?  They going to jail someone for being too thin when they see them walk down the street?

The person who has been dragged through the slaughterhouse lately by these religious radicals is Justin Nichols who just so happens to be gay and running for Plano City Council.  He recently appeared on the front page of the Metro Section of the Dallas Morning News three times this week, the front page of the Plano Star Courier, and the front page of the Dallas Voice.  People are watching how this battle goes, and we must win!  The fight is not over!

We have got to stand up to this bigotry and say NO MORE!!  It is going to cost money to fight the radical fundamentalists, and I need your help.  If you have already donated to the campaign, thank you!  If not, please click here and make a contribution today.  MOST IMPORTANTLY, PLEASE FORWARD THIS TO 10 FRIENDS OF YOURS SO THEY CAN HELP TOO!

To give you an idea of what you donation can do, please consider:

$20 allows us to buy breakfast for volunteer who will knock on hundreds of voters’ doors.

$50 pays for 10 yard signs, or makes it possible to reach 100 voters by mail, or 500 voters by phone.

$100 pays for 4 large signs, makes it possible to reach 200 voters by mail, or 1,000 voters by phone.

Whatever the amount, your contribution will make the difference in this campaign.

Please join me in standing up against bigotry, intolerance, and equality for every person.  This isn’t about being Republican or Democrat, man or woman, straight or gay - this is about people taking a stand for what is right!

I never imagined taking on this fight so publicly and becoming the poster-child for discrimination in Collin County - but that is where I’ve been led, and I am ready to fight.  I say to those bigots, “BRING IT ON!”

Thank you for your consideration and support, and please remember to forward this on to your friends, whether they are in Plano or not, because this fight affects us all!  I remain

Very truly yours,

Justin Nichols

www.JustinNichols.net

Nichols has also been endorsed by the Victory Fund, and encourage you to visit their website.  

So I went with some lists of the top 25 guys, though I won’t list them all here one by one as this page would simply be a list and serve no purpose. Instead here are some interesting ‘top’ facts and opinions that you may not know, as of March 2008.

In the world of Movies there are lots of ‘top lists’. How about the best 25 sex scenes from Hollywood? Brokeback Mountain is in there at number 21, Boogie Nights at 18 and top of the list is a movie called ‘Y Tu Mama Tambien’. As for the top stars under 25 years old at the moment: Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter as I am sure you know) is 24^th, Zac Afron (yeah!) is at number three and Scarlett Johansson (who is not a man) is at number one. (Yup, she is still only 23.) You can find more fun top lists at movies.aol.com

Carrying on with the task of finding the top men in various categories I stumbled across top10.gaywired.com/Scene which had a list of their top ten male celebrities past and present. There were great shots of Aaron ‘Ajay’ Savvy with his muscled physique and military appearance. Men’s Fitness model Matt Cohen is simply to die for with his boyish good looks as is James Marsden. ‘The face of Speedo’ (do we look at the faces of guys wearing Speedos?) is gorgeous model TJ Wilk and he ranks number four with actor Chris Evens making it to number one. If I were you I’d look at all the guys on this list as they are each as hot as each other.

Then I found a very handy site for anyone who is into top 10 lists: top10lists.com which had nine main categories though sadly none were gay porn or anything sexy like that. It does have the top 10 naked people as caught on satellite for one of those ‘view the Earth’ programs you can get for you computer, the top ten urinals of the world (number one being at the Amundsen-Scott Soul Pole Station!) and the top ten most questionable ‘Best Picture’ Oscar awards. (How Green Was My Valley that won over Citizen Kane.)

But we’re getting off the point here. And my point is that to find the hottest 25 guys in the world seems like and impossible task. Maybe you should come up with your own list? I know who mine would include: my partner, the guy who works at the bar down the road and possibly Chris O’Donnell playing Robin in the Batman films. You see? Not everyone who is hot appears in these lists.

Nearly there: the top 100 sexiest men in the world (according to new Woman magazine and as found at http://www.entertainmentwise.com/news?id=27160) included at the top of their list, with my personal comments on the right:

1. Take That Then and now
2. Daniel Craig I’ll let them have that one
3. Johnny Depp It’s a question of taste.
4. Orlando Bloom Oh yes.
5. Jake Gyllenhaal Sure does it for me
6. George Clooney Uh hu, if you like them older
7. Brad Pitt Again?
8. Matt Willis Who?
9. Robbie Williams Oh per-lease!
10. Justin Timberlake He has his days… he looks hot in the new Madonna Video “4 Minutes”- but Madonna has that effect on people.

So finally, the hottest gay “action” star? A quick search reveals Chris Geary or Bret Wolfe who you can see at badpuppy.com forget the rest and go view him now!

Clinton said she opposes a measure that would ban gay marriage in Pennsylvania and proposed a few other great ideas:

• Eliminate her husband’s policy of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” that prevents gays from serving openly in the military. Asked if she could do so by a signing order connected to a military appropriations bill, Clinton said she didn’t think that is possible but she would look into it and do it if it were legal.

• Be “very strongly outspoken” against foreign governments that execute gays and use financial assistance and other leverage to prevent the killings.  (read our article on dangerous gay travel destinations regarding this)

• Support federal domestic partner legislation to extend rights to all same-sex couples.

• Support services for gay youth, including guidance for schools about the discrimination they face.

• Continue to support gay pride celebrations, to the extent that security would allow. “I don’t think the Secret Service let Bill walk in a parade when he became president,” Hillary said.

She also recently spoke on AIDS/HIV Issues. I love Hillary and hope she gets the Democratic nomination for president. I am sad that MoveOn.org had to support Obama in such an early state of the election. They clearly do not represent millions of progressive voters who are for Hillary.

Obama and McCain declined the interview with the Philadelphia Gay News.

Women’s swimwear styles have expanded, and regardless of whether you prefer men’s swim trunks or a bikini, you’ll find a suit that meshes well with your style and allows you to enjoy the water. Mix and match tankini tops sold by many retailers including landsend.com will work well under a tee or on their own with a pair of trunks. The mix and match swimwear trend also works wellfor those o us who might need one size on the bottom and another on top. Girly-girls will rejoice this summer. The suits are retro, reminiscent of the late 1940’s and early 1950’s. For those of us with a few figure flaws to hide, many of these suits also cover the damaging evidence of too many sweet treats and holiday cocktails. Getglamorous.blogspot.com has some great designer shots of these suits.

For the boys, there are a number of trunk styles available and the growing popularity of rash guards allows you to cover a bit more and still look in style. For most guys, a more tailored style of trunks will be more flattering than the traditional elastic waist. Fortunately, these are already showing up in stores all over. Prints, particularly retro-inspired Hawaiian ones, are in style for guys this year. Lengths range from a long board short to a fairly short length. Choose the one that best suits your body type and personal preferences. You will find great trunks available at all price points, and may want to pick up several to offer a variety of options, whether you are planning a cruise with your partner or an office pool party. A visit to your local department store is a good place to start, but online retailers also offer a wide selection of trunks and rash guards.

Regardless of the trends, choose a suit that fits your body well. String bikinis and Speedos are not a comfortable or practical choice for most of us, but thankfully flattering and sexy swimwear is available in all sizes. Sadly, you do still have to go try it on if you actually want it to fit.

My advice to the gay community is SHUT UP, just don’t talk about it. If you walk around talking about what you do in the bedroom, you should be on the pervert channel. - State Senator Gary George of Oregon, (sen.garygeorge@state.or.us)

Here is what a friend (Floyd Martin) wrote on a myspace bulletion that I totally agree with:

Yeah, Senator George,
I will stop talking about it when you take down all pictures of your wife and children, and stop wearing your wedding ring, and flaunting your heterosexuality. I will stop talking about it when all Americans are allowed to serve their country if they so desire, and to have all the legal benefits that other American couples are afforded. I will shut up when bigots like you do not exist in the world anymore, and unfortunately, thats not going to happen for a long time. So, your desire is not our wish. I have an idea, why don’t you shut up, and resign, and go crawl under the rock you came from. Free Speech and civil rights are not only for those that you agree with, and are too small-minded to see reality. Shame on you. — FD Martin Oklahoma City, OK

The artwork for Hard Candy has also been released on the Madonna.com site and looks hot!! I am excited to hear the rest of the CD when it comes out. If you have not seen the video of Madonna inducted in the Rock and Roll hall of fame on Youtube make sure you watch it. It is a 4 part video and I loved the story of Justin telling everyone of his B-12 injections from Madonna when she told him to “drop em” so she could stick him with a shot.

The full album release of Hard Candy comes April 29 in the US and April 28 internationally. See comments below for the video of Ellen dancing to Madonna’s new 4 Minutes song. Also, read our article on the seductive book by Madonna.

Pre-Order Now!

You normally see Muslim women in public pools such as the Hurricane Harbor having to wear their full clothing due to religious reasons. I thought this was a neat option found at ahiida.com for those with Islamic roots.

I did my usual searching about on the net and found some related articles and info, which I’ve put together for you, to try and explain what exactly is, or isn’t, going on.

It was around August 2007 that news started breaking that Australia was going to ‘clean up internet porn’ but how it was going to do this was another matter. Then Prime Minister, John Howard, announced that a whole heap of cash was going to be made available to assist a new programme, ‘Assisting Australian Families Online’ which would come under the auspices of NetAlert – Australia’s internet safety advisory body. Some say that this was just a ploy to recruit the Christian voters in the upcoming elections, (the announcement was made in a webcast that went out to 770 churches and which was watched by an estimated 100,000 Christians,) so bear that in mind.

The scheme works in two ways: families can opt to have a filtering programme installed on their home PCs or they can requests a ‘clean’ internet connection – one from a service provider that is responsible from blocking porno content at ISP level. (At the main hub.) These options take up most of the budget and the rest goes on publicity, an awareness campaign and ‘internet police’ and prosecutions. The main thrust of this action, of course, is to protect children from unscrupulous website owners and others who provide CP, but there were concerns from legitimate adult webmasters (providing 18+ adult entertainment) that their businesses could also be affected.

There were more concerns about the scheme when, soon after the filter system went public, a teenage hacker managed to find a way around it within half an hour. A second version was released and this took the lad 40 minutes to get through.

The caldron bubbled some more as new legislation was proposed that would make the owning of five or more pornographic movies an offense, (in the Northern Territories) even if they were for ‘home use’ as opposed to distribution. There were, some say, good reasons behind this move, again to do with trying to stamp down on the occurrences of CP in those areas but the ideas were called ‘draconian’ by the New Zealand Herald and slammed by the Australian Christian Lobby as not going far enough, after all, what about other parts of the country?

So it seems, from what I could find out, that the screaming headline of ‘Australia bans porn’ is not as dramatic as it sounds and you don’t need to be too concerned that it is a trend that will start to spread to other countries. There were (and still are as far as I know, though the controversy seems to have died down recently) plans to help parents limit the kind of content that was accessible on their home PCs, via a couple of methods. This can only be good news if you have young children who are adept at using the computer and internet (as more and more are) and you don’t want them to stumble across inappropriate content. The idea that a government can tell you what you, as an adult, can and can’t view totally smacks of censorship and I doubt that it would be stood for by human rights campaigners. Though don’t forget that in some other countries the government have already taken this step. For example, in China a law has existed since 1997 that makes it a criminal offense to produce a piece of work (art, literature etc.) that is deemed a ‘computer crime’ and promotes, among other things, ‘pornography.’

And there is one other thing to remember. The attempt by Howard to woo the Christian vote on the back of a ‘clean up the net campaign’ didn’t help him. A new Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd, was elected in December 2007.

Final Point:  Who wants to visit a country that bans porn or takes away basic rights? Not someone who demands freedom.  This is a right every adult should have.  It should be the parents decision to put filters on what their kids view online not the government or internet provider.  What will they ban next?

I would expect to find more gay news related resources such as GayWired.com, PlanetOut.com, 365gay.com, etc. The strange thing is that neither MSN nor Yahoo search has the hate group listed in the top 10. So I suppose maybe some googlebombing is taking place? Similar to the tactics websites used to get George Bush to rank high on the term “idiot.”

With the rise of hate crimes lately including the killing of a teenager in gay California and neo-conservative religious radicals going up against gays we need as much love and support as we can get and not expect to be bashed just by searching online. We should all at least try to get google to remove this or lower it down for the term “gay”. I am not trying to tell google how to run their search engine but it is unfair that they are using the same techniques of google bombing to rank high on this highly popular term.

No Society that has embraced gays has lasted more than two decades? I would like to know where this so-called Representative got her facts.
“It will destroy our young people and it will destroy this nation.” Yes, you will Representative Sally Kern of District 84, a Republican in Oklahoma City.

You may reach Rep. Sally Kern at 2300 N. Lincoln Blvd. Room 332, Oklahoma City, OK 73105. Her email is sallykern@okhouse.gov. Feel free to send her a piece of your mind. If you live in her district in Oklahoma be sure and get out and vote. This is what happens when you do not get off your hides to vote people like this get into office and spread their hate. Hate is the disease that she already has!!

Rep. Sally Kern’s gets our Worst Person of the World vote for today!

I just do not understand why You tube videos will not play on this site so here is the link.

You should check out the very informative pages at Gay.ru before you start to think about the club scene as here you can also read up on the background to gays and the law, history of he gay movement and other general subjects related to queerness in the country. Once you are armed with the background information you can start looking for the club scene.

Saint Petersburg is a Russian city located in the North-western Federal District of the country on the Neva river and is named after Peter the Great who founded it in 1703. I’m sure he wouldn’t know what to make of it these days though, especially if he were to call in at “Sinners” which boasts “Four floors, one dance floor, bars, splendid romantic view from the top of the roof. Full striptease all night long. Nude dancers mix with the crowd and occasionally offer paint and brushes to visitors to draw on their exposed bodies.” Sounds like fun to me!

There used to be another night club in the city called the 69 Club but word has it that this is now used by predominantly heterosexual teenagers so is probably best avoided. For other entertainments you could try the cafes, “Kabaret” – “Charming drag queen talk show. Cosy and relaxed atmosphere. Inexpensive bar, karaoke, large dance floor, huge darkroom. Fridays and Saturdays are overcrowded, many good looking cadets from the Navy Academy.” Sounds like even more fun! And the “Mono Club” which is considerably smaller and mixed.

There are also four saunas in this city and you can find the full details of all of these places here.

Moscow is the capital of Russia and so we expect it to be bigger, bolder and more liberal. Actually there were only three night clubs listed at Gay.ru when I looked. “Chance Club” is open every night and is now a revamped version of the oldest club in the city. The quality of the crowd varies but it is the biggest and most used of the clubs so you’re probably going to score if you go there for a night out!

The “Three Monkeys” club is also open all week and has several floors, internet access, drag shows, go-go boys and a ‘cinema’ room. Like all of the clubs there is a cover charge or an entrance fee and these vary from venue to venue but generally the entrance charges seem to be cheaper (sometimes even free) for men. Guys at Chance, for example, pay 150 Rubles to get in while women pay 300! That’s around $24.00 for a girl to access a night club in case you were wondering. The third listed club, “Propaganda”, hosts a gay/mixed tea dance on a Sunday where you get good value for money with cheaper drinks and no cover charge.

From my quick look at these places it seems that the country is more liberal and accepting than I first thought it would be. The write ups and reviews of these clubs make them sound like any club you might find in New York or London – though we know that the sexy Russian boys will be a different matter! Check Gay.ru as it’s one of the more informed sites about gay Russia and also lists saunas, cafes and other entertainments in various locations around the country. Also make sure you check out the ‘life in Russia’ section as this will tell you what to expect generally if and when you go and visit.

Clay Bennett, the man who owns the Supersonics (or whatever they are called), is a notorious homophobe, and thats part of the reason the good people of Seattle would not let them bully them into paying for a new staduim.

He is also one of the richest men in Oklahoma City, and if he wants to bring an NBA team here, he should, but not on the backs of the poorest people that reside here. The little old lady shopping at Buy For Less, deciding whether she should buy groceries or get her medication this month, will pay a penny sales tax every time she makes a purchase. So will I, the Gay man ,who Bennett and Cornett and thier cronies so passionatly oppose and donated millions to anti-Gay campaigns in the state of Washington. That little old lady at Buy For Less will never attend a game at the Ford Center, nor will I. In
my case, not so much on principle, just not interested in pro basketball. When we pay teachers what we pay athletes, then I might care. Until then, I do not. That same aforementioned senior citizen might like basketball, but she could not afford to go the games. Funny thing is, also as mentioned before, she and everyone else in this city will be paying for it.

I have lived in this city all of my life, and am very interested in city government. I know this town like the back of my hand, (give me an address, I’ll tell you which house it is…)I have lived and worked in all areas of it for almost 42 years., and am probably the only person you know that watches all of the meetings religiously on Channel 20. I would run for office if I thought I could get elected. Of course, I want to see the city progress. Of course, I want to see the merchants and waiters in Bricktown do well, but a sales tax for an NBA team is NOT the answer.

The concerts will still come to The Ford Center. They make money and thats the driving force behind that business. To infer that that won’t happen suddenly because we don’t extend this sales tax is pure bullshit. Yes, they will.

I was opposed to the original MAPS Project. I didn’t trust this city. We had a brand new jail that was flooding and that people could kick bricks out and escape. We had a failed string of pearls project that never went anywhere, and someone stole all of the federal money. I was wrong, and I admit it.

I was all for Maps For Kids, as a lifelong resident and product of the Oklahoma City Public Schools. We got three new high schools out of the deal, and although I haven’t paid much attention to John Marshall, Grant and Douglass are beautiful.

Mick Cornett is correct when he says that your taxes will not increase if you vote yes for this. What he isn’t telling you is that your sales tax will GO DOWN at the end of this month if you vote no. Thats right, Maps for Kids expires at the end of March, 2008.

When MAPS for Kids was about to expire, the city asked on thier website if we should extend the sales tax for MAPS 3, and if so, what for. The response was that yes, we should, and that we needed to improve public transportation. With the rising cost of fuel, and the fact that our bus system pure and simple SUCKS, that was a good idea. That has all been placed on the back burner, as Bennett and McClendon and the ilk approached thier buddy, Cornett, about buying them a basketball team.

With the money they have, that team will come to OKC. No one has said that it wouldn’t, and as far as I know, they arn’t even looking anywhere else. Thats fine, I just don’t want to pay for it.

People I have lots of love and respect for feel very different then I about this issue. I am glad that they are passionate, and I am probably going to be on the losing end of this stick, but I will vote No, and it it passes, its certainly not the end of the world, not for me, not for you, and damn sure not for the snake oil salesmen who promise economic development in this city because of an NBA team. (You know, one of the tribes wants to build a mega-casino at Hefner and I-35 that would hire 1,900 people. Cornett is very much against that. I realize cities do not get sales tax or much of anything else from tribal ventures, but 1,900 of your citizens employed and paying sales tax on everything they purchase has got to be an economic boon, compared to maybe 50 full-time employees and maybe 100 temporary employees during basketball season).

One more point and I will shut up. This whole staduim to lure pro sports teams things is a dangerous road for municipalities to go down. There is always going to be another city, facing a resurgence, willing to pay for a new staduim or whatever to snag them away. Businessmen like Bennett know this. We are a temporary stop on this journey. Three years from now, they will be asking you again to pay for thier arena, because Wichita or Omaha, or whoever is building a new one.

Vote how you like. So will I.
Thank you for reading.

Floyd D. Martin, Jr.
Oklahoma City, OK

I tried to find out a list of places best avoided for gay travelers:

In an interview with The Advocate, travel writer David Kirby mentioned the obvious places such as “a lot of the Islamic world” and you can imagine that Iraq and the surrounding area, though interesting, is probably best avoided at present. But he also mentions some not so obvious places. He states that Jamaica, for example, can be tricky. Some businesses there will not rent rooms to same sex couples if there is only one bed in the room and there have been reports of other anti-gay behavior too.

Deciding what new and interesting place to visit can be a tricky decision as some places we already know are very gay friendly, like Thailand and Myanmar, whereas others are not so obvious. If you travel to Brazil for example you can expect a warm welcome in some cities but not in others and the pro/anti gay feeling varies from place to place. Egypt is another paradox: you will encounter lots of attention from men (if you are a man or woman) and sex is readily available if you are discrete, you will even see policemen holding hands in the street but don’t read anything into this. The country has very harsh anti-homosexuality laws.

I did a bit of lateral thinking in my search for the top ten most dangerous places for gay travelers and found a list of the ten ‘worst’ countries to be in, if you are gay. (According to queerty.com and ‘the Southern Voice’.) These findings are based on anti-human rights reports that outline details about countries that discriminate against citizens based on their sexual orientation. Some are obvious when you think about the religions of those countries while one, at least, is very surprising, number 8, Poland. Here is the full list.

1. Uganda (Consensual gay sex punishable by life in prison)
2. Iran (Punishable by death)
3. Egypt (You can be arrested and tortured especially if you have HIV)
4. Saudi Arabia (Floggings and even death)
5. Nigeria (Up to 14 years in prison)
6. United Arab Emirates (You can be arrested)
7. Cameroon (You can be arrested)
8. Poland (President denied gay rights groups)
9. Nepal (Not illegal but much harassment)
10. India (Up to ten years in prison)

But it’s not all bad news. In the same The Advocate interview, Kirby pointed out that places like Great Britain and France are working hard to attract more gay visitors, as are places in the USA, Provincetown, Massachusetts, for example. The general rule when traveling is to trust your instincts. Don’t go anywhere where you don’t feel safe, don’t be provocative in your behavior and remember that if you are in a ‘danger zone’, the local police may not be on your side if you get in to trouble.

A good way to check what the gay local ‘scene’ and attitudes towards it are is to pick up a travel guide. The ‘Indie’ ones and more well known ones like Lonely Planet usually have a gay section by country so you can judge for yourself whether a place is safe or not. IN a nutshell: play it safe and have a great time.

The official study that caused all this uproar can be found at annals.org. While the study does not jump to any significant conclusions, the media did, ranging from calling MRSA the “new HIV” to linking it with anal intercourse.

What is MRSA? MRSA stands for Methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus, further clarified as hospital acquired (HA-MRSA) and community acquired (CA-MRSA).  First and foremost, it should be clarified that antibiotic resistant bugs have been around, and are becoming more prevalent in all walks of life, and all communities regardless of sexual orientation. Staphylococcus aureus is a common bacterium that normally lives on the skin and in the nasal passages. This infection can produce symptoms ranging from a simple skin abscess or lesions to cellulitis and even death. While many bacteria produce infections, the primary concern with MRSA is that very few antibiotics are effective, and in the case of new strains even fewer drugs may be available to treat these complex infections. For more information on the specifics about MRSA, see the mayoclinic.com site.

That said, what does this mean for you? What should you be doing to protect yourself? The simple fact is that MRSA can be spread through skin to skin contact of any sort.  Moreover, staph infections of the skin often occur in moist areas, including the buttocks and groin. This is entirely unrelated to actual sexual contact. Prevention is not so hard really. Use good hygiene. Wash your hands regularly. If you do have a skin infection, or a partner does, seek treatment quickly and request that skin lesions be cultured before beginning treatment so they can be treated appropriately.  Really, though, these are not tips relevant to gay men, but to everyone who uses a gym, might have children in daycare, or have lunch with a health care provider.