Don’t you just love a good rumble?

Although, I have to confess that I was really considering not adding this post about One Million Moms at all, it feels somehow wrong to even recognize their existence, as if I’m somehow validating their right to be… well… a group of hate-filled religious extremists, I guess!

Yes, the American Family Associations nastiest splinter group is back in the spotlight again, and from the people who brought you the attack on Home Depot for supporting Gay Pride, the scatter-brained attack against GLEE, and their “boycott” of almost every brand seen in any ad break for any program they think is “Trashy”, they’re now ‘going after’ Toys ‘R’ Us!

Aside from pointing out that they watch far too much TV (that’s those right-wing Christian stay-at-home moms for you. If they’re not out in the woods shooting Deer they’re sat on their ass eating cookies, getting fat and finding anything they can to scream at the world about) I thought it would be fun to show you how the most vociferous people who claim to be “freedom-loving” and “Christian” are often anything but.

Let me tell you about this latest battle in their imagined “culture war” (yes, that’s what they think they’re taking part in, bless them).

So we’ll start back when they decided to attack JC Penny for bringing Ellen Degeneres in to represent their brand.

Of course, as shoppers – and right-wing Christian religious extremists – they love shopping, ironically that’s something they have in common with us! So when JC Penny asked the gorgeous, funny, smart and well adjusted Ellen Degeneres to become their spokeswoman (can you tell I’m a fan?) the One Million Moms crazies realized that they had nothing in common with this personality. I think that’s what it comes down to really. It seems that all the people they attack are actually intelligent, well-rounded, mentally stable modern people, and that’s totally the opposite of what OMM is about!

So, the OMM extremists demanded that JC Penny remove Ellen as their spokesperson, and they issued their demand with the threat that JC Penny would loose customers if they did not comply with their demands. Of course, OMM didn’t consider that they are actually running far short of being one million, they’re more like 20,000 (and even that is a very generous guess). In reality the OMM group is likely no larger than your average knitting club in Texas.

They often make claims that their “pressure” on companies has resulted in success, when in fact they neglect that advertising across all industries has become extremely limited due to the financial crisis. It’s actually quite funny to see companies complying with their demands on the face of it, just to placate them. But I do wish these companies would be honest and say “we couldn’t give a crap about your unreasonable demands, we cut the ads for budget reasons and not because you threatened us!”

What this fanatical group also underestimated, is that you need to have public support for a boycott of any large company, and the numbers supporting Ellen and JC Penny far outweighs the number of fanatics demanding this change. One look at their little social network shows that they barely have 2000 members – I have more people following me on another blog. Maybe that’s why thousands of FaceBook pages sprang up within hours of the demand being made public, all supporting Ellen and JC Penny, and all heaping insult on the OMM mentalists. Perhaps that’s also why the One Million Moms own FaceBook page is constantly under attack from others who would like to stop their hate for good?

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I love Christmas, and loathe it in equal measure simultaneously. I’m one of those guys from a large family, and every year we have those get-togethers where all the expected happens; someone has a blazing row with their partner about their teenager being given a thimble of wine, uncle George has a lengthy discussion with aunt Doris about the destruction of their local pub during the Blitz and whether it happened on a Tuesday or Saturday, and everyone has a very uncomfortable moment when a secret is revealed and you find out that back in 1942 a long passed-on relative was caught in a compromising position with a sailor… all the while I’m thinking up an excuse to get out to have a drink with a friend.

But, there are things I really love about Christmas too, like seeing some of the friends I’ve missed all year through my lack of FaceBook dedication, the look of joy on a persons face when they open that present and find that first edition book you found for them and they’ve wanted since they were a spotty teenager with greasy hair nodding along to Nirvana in your bedroom, and the rowdy parties where there is bound to be a really hot guy just desperate for someone to date for just a couple of weeks so he won’t have to rely on a previous shag buddy on New Year.

I know you might think I must be really good a buying presents for others now I’ve mentioned that first edition book, right? Well, that’s a rare occurrence, and I maybe get that reaction once over the holiday. Normally I end up buying my friends something pretty predictable and boring.

It’s not my fault I cant stand the shopping trips and increasingly buy everything on the internet. I have a phobia of adults dressed as Santa’s helpers, and all that cheesy Christmas music playing in all the shops really could lead to a strangling spree with tinsel being the weapon of choice!

So, this year, I think I have decided that all of my friends are getting adult gifts, toys, from one place. That way I can guarantee to shock everyone, and please them all at the same time. I know that although they might go red and make assertions that they would “never use such a thing”, they’ll be at home that night getting it on with their inanimate object (or, in the case of battery powered devices, very animated!)

I can’t really loose with some adult toys, can I?

For Sally, the almost virginal religious and conservative ex-colleague – a Rampant Rabbit.

For Geoff, the straight gym jock who we all have doubts about – an Aneros with some lube.

For Carl, the party animal who gets far too much sex already (and we’re all secretly jealous of) – some “Delay” cream.

And for Steven, the handsome college boy just exploring his gay side – a years supply of assorted flavored condoms.

Bring on Christmas, and may it be extremely merry for all! ;)

You have to love Armani Exchange for supporting their gay customers in their new ads that came out today. Armani Exchange or A/X not only has the gay couple and the lesbian lovers on the email campaign ads they sent out but they are also on the main website. This is not a very discreet love affair A/X is giving us now is it? How sweet of them and now I am ready for my paycheck so I can get into an Armani Exchange near me and buy me some new jeans. The new jean styles are hot, hot, hot along with the Spring collection of Tee shirts. I have not seen advertising in mainstream media for retail ever for Valentines Day that included a gay couple or lesbian couple. This is just great!!

This is a great way to start out the beginning of the month to see such a sweet ad from A/X. If you are searching for some Valentine’s Day gifts for your lover, husband, or wife then check out our ideas.

The best gifts are thoughtful, personal, and well suited to the recipient. Work gift exchanges and gifts for family can leave you looking for the right gift for someone you don’t know well. If you need to buy a gift for a lesbian you don’t know well enough to choose a personalized gift for, try some of these ideas or opt for gifts that are apt to be fairly universally appreciated this holiday season. Look for gifts that are gender neutral, practical, and not apt to be embarrassing at the office party or family dinner. These ideas might also help if you’re simply short on time to find that perfect gift.

In lieu of yet another gift basket, consider making a donation in the recipient’s name to a local charity dealing with gay and lesbian issues. Most cities have a community resource center offering counseling, support groups, and youth services and these facilities are always in need of funds. You could also opt to make a donation to a larger national charity. A donation to the Human Rights Campaign at hrc.org is another good alternative.

Tech toys are one of the better gift options today, for nearly everyone. While your average gift budget won’t cover a new iPhone or netbook, some tech gifts are well within a reasonable gift exchange budget. Consider a cleverly concealed flash drive from Etsy.com, an iPod or cell phone cozy, or a sturdy and practical messenger bag sized to carry her laptop or netbook. More playful gifts might include USB powered gadgets and toys of all sorts from ThinkGeek.com.

While we all know that gift cards are a cliché at the holiday season, there’s a reason they’re popular. If you’re short on time, you can have an Amazon.com gift certificate on its way via email in only minutes. Gift cards to Itunes.com are another excellent option for nearly anyone. Local restaurants are nearly always a safe bet.

Of course, with any list of gift exchanges comes a list of things not to give. Avoid giving gendered gifts to a lesbian you know unless you are absolutely sure of her gender presentation and identity. Also, please do not give her any season of the L Word on DVD unless she requests it. She’s seen it, in all likelihood. If she loves it, she probably already owns it. If she finds Jenny unbelievably annoying, she doesn’t want to own it.

Next week we will present a gay fashion exclusive on summer swimwear 2008 but until then let’s leave you with an interesting site I came across. This site presents an option that Muslim women may not have had before from Australia, the same country that Aussie Bum originated from.

You normally see Muslim women in public pools such as the Hurricane Harbor having to wear their full clothing due to religious reasons. I thought this was a neat option found at ahiida.com for those with Islamic roots.

So, it’s that time of year again, you’re looking forward to the big day, you know where you are going, who you are going to see, you’ve got everything sorted and arranged but¦ oh Horror! You have forgotten to buy him (or that special lady lover) that special gift! What to do? What do you get the man who has everything?

You really need to spend a few minutes thinking about what kind of guy he is and then a few more minutes searching around for ideas. As we all know the internet is the place to shop these days but there is so much on offer it’s hard to now where to start. A quick search on ‘top ten gay gifts should bring up plenty of ideas, if not try some of the things I found:

First of all you’ll need to now what kind of ‘he’ he is. If he is a Technophile then you might like to think along the lines of gadgets and gizmos. I have to admit this isn’t me and looking at what some of these phones and things do boggles my mind but what about a new cell phone? Check out this listing for a top ten of the best looking cell phones or read these CNET reviews for a top rate list. Don’t forget the iPhone that includes iPod features, video screen, internet connection and oh yes, you can even make calls on it too. The accessories for the iPhone will be big this Christmas and even help with some of that dreaded Holiday travel on the way back home if you can purchase noise canceling headphones. And then there are games of course, with xbox.com bringing you all the X-box updates and news and Playstation is doing the same for the Sony side of the market. Buy.com is actually running a great deal on the Sony Playstation 3 and claim to have it in stock.

If your gay loved one is more of an out and about Techie then he may love you for ever if you present him with something for the car, and I don’t mean a pair of furry dice. Check out garmin.com/giftguide for the latest news on what’s to be had in GPS land. They have everything here from sports watches with GPS to things for your boat or plane – the ultimate techie gift.

But what if he’s not a techie person but more a Creative Sort? What are the top rated movies and books for the gay man who appreciates art and literature? Amazon.com has a list of the top rated presents for your gay male friends, at least in their opinion. Number one is ‘Clicking beat on the brink of Nada’ a novel about adolescent love by Keith Hale. Further down the list but of more interest (probably) to your older gay friends who will remember the ‘Tales of the city’ series is ‘Michael Tolliver Lives by Armistead Maupin. Also in the Amazon list are your, by now, standard ‘Brokeback Mountain’ and the ‘Spartacus Guide’. I found this Amazon.com gay list for male friends by the way. But to get something very special from the art world you could try fulcrumgallery.com for some original works of art.

Or maybe he is a Lifestyle Guru in which case something for body, soul or home might be more appropriate. How about a Christmas hamper and something for the kitchen from Dean & Deluca at deandeluca.com? A new travel bag, wallet or laptop case from ebags.com or some unusual jewellery from justmetal.com where silver and titanium are the metals of the moment.

As I said before you could search around for ever as there is so much out there and these are just a few ideas I happened along. But remember that if all else fails there are always the good old adult sites to give you some inspiration. Gayemart.com comes up with a good list of ideas from DVDs to toys and if you are in Europe then clonezonedirect.co.uk will do you just as well. But if all else fails and you find yourself there on Christmas morning with nothing to give him then just strip naked and tie a bow around yourself. After all, you are all he should need.

Gay Couples and Credit / Fun Gag Gift Ideas

Be the life of the party with these great gag gifts!

The mission here is to find a Christmas present that is fun or one you can use for the best Dirty Santa gift. Sounds simple doesn’t it? But I have a strange feeling that it’s not going to be that easy, particularly as we are finding it on line and there is bound to be a whole host of things out there to give your friends that are fun, sexy and a little bit gay.

So, I start with an internet search ‘gay gag gifts’ and come up with… several sites that are not what I am looking for as usual, followed by a couple that might start us on the road to seasonal mirth. Here we go:

There was a glass on sale on eBay on which was written ‘warning the contents of this glass will cause your penis to grow one inch’ but, by the time you read this it will be gone as I bought it. Ha, ha – just kidding. Next up was another eBay item, this time several packets of Jamaican Cock Soup Mix. I kid you not. You can actually buy packets of Cock soup and not just from eBay either, check the soup aisles next time you go to a superstore and if there isn’t any there then insist they get some in for you. There were several other gag gift ideas for sale on eBay so that could well be a place to check out for more quirky and unusual items.

Meanwhile, back to my search list: Everyone likes novelty soap don’t they? No? Well, shame as gaysoaps.com has a great mix of them. There are romantic soaps, rainbow coloured ones and humorous ones with naughty and personalised soaps on offer too. I then moved on and found some great political ideas that aren’t necessarily gay but… Like Hilary Clinton nutcrackers and the Larry Craig action doll that takes a macho stance and has a voice that says ‘I am not gay’. Here is the page for your novelty American political gag dolls.

I changed my search from ‘gag’ to ‘funny’ as I wanted to get away from politics and found myself in T-Shirt world, or rather T-Shirt heaven as loads of sites came up all with T-Shirts sporting funny slogans. Prankplace.com had a nice selection of retro style shirts some of which were camp if not gay in nature. If you enter the word ‘gay’ in their search box you’ll get the full list. There are also slogans on T-Shirts at Cafepress.com a site that carries more styles of shirt but less in the way of gay humour.

Prankroom.com came up next with something different: magnetic bumper gags. There were various slogans available here, ‘proud to be gay’, ‘Closet queen’ and ‘man whore’ for example, plus many others that are too rude to mention. It’s worth searching around this site as they have other categories too, like presents for the bathroom that are again, not necessarily gay but very camp. For example, how about a Psycho shower curtain that’s white with a silhouette of a mad mother with a knife on it?

Maybe it’s time to leave the searching there… What was clear from my trawl around these sites, and others I didn’t mention because they weren’t that gay, was that there are many products out there which will do as a humorous gay gift for Christmas. But I have to say that you will have to search for a while to find something just right. The thing about finding a gag gift for a friend or partner is that it should be appropriate to that person. Just because a T-Shirt says something funny doesn’t mean it’s going to be funny when someone puts it on. So think what would be funny for that person and personalize your gag gift.

How about a tee shirt with a nude image of Mike Huckabee with another guy making out? With superimposed hard steel ab bodies of course. This would make the bible thumpers fall over while they are protesting along I-35 gay bars.

Other Dirty Santa or gag gift ideas for the Holiday season include stripping games and even a Better Sex Video which will surely put a blush on someones face. Stripping games can be fun because if someone opens it up it can add more fun to a Holiday party where everyone starts drinking more and getting more wild. Nothing is wrong wtih spicing things up with some erotic toys and even a surpise stripper or entertainment. Have fun and enjoy!