I started writing about it and stopped, because, really, you should all head over to Multidimensional.Me and read it, rather than about it, there.

Koan, thanks for a great edition!

June’s Carnival of Bent Attractions will be hosted at 2sides2ron. Get your submissions in by 12:01AM on June 2nd!

This edition is written by Koan Bremner. It originally appeared at Multidimensional.Me.

For your reading pleasure and thought provocation, here is this month’s edition of the Carnival of Bent Attractions, which consists of “blog posts on articles of interest to the gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, trans and queer communities”. This month’s selection of posts cover all of those angles, and more – so, without further prevarication, let’s get started.

For those readers of this blog who don’t identify as GLBTQ, the term “queer” may not be clear in this context. Over at Desperate Kingdoms,” Winter has written an excellent personal perspective, in the post Queering Identity, on what her queer identity means to her:

Obviously, I’m one those people who likes to refer to themselves as “queer.” In fact, I feel more comfortable calling myself “queer” than I do a “lesbian” or a “woman.” This is not to say I have no lesbian or female identity because I clearly do, but I never feel entirely at ease in these identities.

Winter goes on to reflect:

In calling myself queer, I express resistance to the imposition of regulatory norms and categories of sex, sexuality and gender, but I don’t consider “queer” to be an outright rejection of sexual or gender identity per se. Most of us need identities because they give us structure and meaning in our lives and the majority of us probably do inhabit fairly stable sex and gender identities. But I think it’s vital to reject the notion that such identities must be stable, unitary, or permanent in order to be genuine or deserving of social privilege.

Winter also discusses the venerable institution of the “coming out” story. That’s not an institution unique to the lesbian community, of course – I suspect that most trans people have a “coming out” story to tell, even if not all of them choose to tell it. At “Life, Law and Gender“, Denise tells something of the trauma of revealing to her then-wife exactly how she felt inside, in the harrowing post “I hate knives“:

In the kitchen, we had a drawer just for knives. I could do it, I was now sure. I opened the drawer and took out the largest, a butcher knife. I held it to my chest. One quick thrust. How long would it hurt? Would that hurt stop the hurt inside? Would death come quickly? I hoped so. I put the knife away. I walked into the bedroom and shut the door; I tied two of my belts together, looped it over the archway between our bed and bath rooms, stood on a chair and tied it to my neck. I kicked away the chair. I hate knives.

Denise survived that experience – and recently used that tale as an instructional tool in helping her fellow law students understand something of the reality of transgender existence for their “Law and the Politics of Identity” class. Many transsexual people turn to the internet looking for information, advice or support for their transsexuality – and many provide that support, not least in blog posts and forum interactions. But what happens when the person participating in those ways feels that it’s time to move on? In her excellent post “I don’t want to be a career transsexual” on her blog “Sarah’s Transition Musings“, Sarah Brown considers how, and when, she might reach that point:

But its been occurring to me that one day, I will need to disengage from this community, stop “being a transsexual”, and get on with my life. What’s less than clear is exactly what this means.

She describes a type of person I’m familiar with:

On the other hand, I’m sure many of us are familiar with the spectacle of the “toxic tranny” (and I don’t have any specific person in mind here); the sort of person we sometimes encounter in various “communities” who seems to be defined by being transsexual, or transgendered, around who we end up having to walk on eggshells, for fear of a tongue-lashing for daring to appear impertinent in the face of the “elder tranny”.

And issues a plea for help:

And if I ever end up being a “toxic tranny”, will someone please slap me?

And that goes for me, too! But while we’re on the subject of “toxic” – it never ceases to sadden me that individuals of one non-hetero persuasion, while claiming the right to their own existence, will gladly denigrate or seek to nullify the validity of the existence of individuals of another non-hetero persuasion. On “Definition“, earlbecke recently took one homosexual blogger to task for some comments which that blogger made about bisexual people:

Second, yes, Dan, this is extraordinarily biphobic. You are denying the validity of the bisexual identity. Just because you’re not as incredibly ignorant as you were once upon a time doesn’t mean this attitude is acceptable.

After issuing a five point rebuttal of the post in question, earlbecke goes on to conclude:

I don’t care if this attitude is a slight improvement over the things youÕve previously written. And I don’t think it’s whining to point out that, as far as non-monosexual orientations go (because bisexual, straight, and gay aren’t the only options), you’re an ignorant asshole.

That is all.

Righteous smack-down! Mind you, it’s not just some homosexual people who refuse to accept the validity of bisexuality – the British media are adept at that, too – as bookdrunk writes in “behold the invisible cape of bisexuality” at “rhetorically speaking..“. After considering the recent case of a (male) politician whose leadership aspirations were derailed by an encounter with a (male) prostitute, bookdrunk notes:

Instantly, the ten year marriage which had yielded children collapsed under the revelation of six-month’s worth of executive stress relief – because, in tabloid world, the touching of two peni is so powerful that it travels backwards in time and erases past acts of heterosexuality. As I theorised at the time, it might one day form the basis of a safe and easy form of time travel.

Certainly one way of “rolling back the years”… but I digress. As bookdrunk later states:

Glaringly absent from all of this is the possibility that a man might identify as heterosexual but happily enjoy relationships with men and women, or that a man might not even get around to identifying as one thing or another at all. Instead, we have the logic that desire has a fixed relationship to specific identities.

Even if you’ve trained and worked your whole life as a carpenter and only occasionally look on the internet at pictures of, say, astronauts, then that means you must actually be space explorer even if you’ve never so much as been up in a plane. Or that going up in a plane on holiday is the same as having a pilot’s licence. But I digress.. :)

What do two digressions make? Oh, never mind. But I’m struck by the phrase “the touching of two peni is so powerful” – because that’s really the point that Dean makes, in “An Army Of Lovers” at “Aman Yala“. After noting with dismay a recent statement by the Greek armed forces that “gays are unfit for military service”, Dean writes:

Such discrimination is appalling under any circumstances, but especially troubling in Greece, which is the last nation on earth that should have such a ban. It seems that Greece has truly rejected its classical past and the collective wisdom of the ancients, who understood that same-sex love and bravery in battle are not mutually exclusive. On the contrary, the ancient Greeks had seen how love between men and military prowess reinforced one another. Simply put, to the ancient Greeks an army of lovers made the best fighters.

And quotes from Plato:

For what lover would not choose rather to be seen by all mankind than by his beloved, either when abandoning his post or throwing away his arms? He would be ready to die a thousand deaths rather than endure this. Or who would desert his beloved or fail him in the hour of danger? The veriest coward would become an inspired hero, equal to the bravest, at such a time; Love would inspire him. That courage which, as Homer says, the god breathes into the souls of some heroes, Love of his own nature infuses into the lover.

Makes sense to me. As do the lessons that can be learned from examining the performance of a successful sports team, as Paula from “Coaching4Lesbians” explains in “Life Lessons from the Maryland Terrapins“:

Freshmen and sophomores aren’t supposed to make clutch shots and they most certainly aren’t supposed to have the poise to beat teams that no one else could beat all season. So what happened? Maryland never got that memo and defied all the odds because they believed they could.

Paula goes on to itemise seven lessons she gleaned from the Terrapins’ success – good stuff! IrrationalPoint, at “The Soapbox“, begins “Friday random ten — the “sleepless confessions of a chronically insomniac activist” edition” with a list of ten songs listened to in an early morning bout of insomnia (ouch – another fellow sufferer) before considering the ongoing antics of “religious conservatives who are suing for the right to be bigots”. For example:

The letter berated students who come out publicly as gay, saying they subject others on campus to “a constant barrage of homosexuality.”

“If gays want to be tolerated, they should knock off the political propaganda,” the letter said.’

i.e. “if gays want to be tolerated, they shouldn’t come out”. Yes, Malhotra has the right to free speech, but it looks like she’s fighting for a legal right to discriminate against LGBT people, and the legal right to restrict other people’s free speech.

The last paragraph of the post particularly resonated with me:

Confession the second: I’m prejudiced and intolerant. I am prejudiced against and intolerant of sexists, racists, chauvinists, homophobes, and conservatives. The difference is I don’t incite violence against them.

And if we’re going to get political… Jay Sennett recently posted on “jay sennett jaywalks” – “The Trans Political Agenda” – as Jay says:

Those pesky, luddite feminists [update 05/04/06: luddite used here to distinguish these feminists from socialist feminists, liberal feminists, marxist feminists, black feminists, working-class feminists, anti-racist feminists, anti-abortion feminists......oh, and lesbian feminists......] hurl the words “trans politics” like certain so-called christians scream about the “gay agenda.”

Rather than cower, I say, Yes, I have an agenda.

And he goes on to list it – and I urge you to go and read it. Some of the points on Jay’s agenda relate, understandably to the law – and just touch on the ways that trans people are marginalised, in law, in many jurisdictions. Of course it’s not just trans people who are thus legally marginalised – as Matt Hill Comer notes at “MattHillNC.com | The Q-triad Blog“. In his post “Liberty under Law? You’ve got to be kidding“, Matt takes as a starting point the theme of the recent “Law Day” in the US, specifically “Liberty under Law: Separate Branches, Balanced Powers” – and goes on to deconstruct that phrase, showing how:

For LGBT Americans there is no such thing as Liberty under Law. For LGBT Americans, our great nation has yet to catch up to the ideals upon which our country was founded and for which we still continue to strive in achieving.

Reading the nine scenarios that Matt lists – which, as he states, are not exhaustive – I have to agree. Not the first time, I breathe a sigh of relief that I am a citizen of the United Kingdom, where the situation isn’t perfect, but, in my opinion, is nowhere near as scary as in the US.

To round out this month’s Carnival, let me draw your attention to “Blog Against Heteronormativity Day“, which was held on April 22. I’d commend many of the posts listed (and linked to in the comments) as well worth reading – and here’s just one for your consideration. “The Prophet Lilith” contributed a post, ” Never Enough Heteronormative Religionists Department” to that endeavour, in which she:

write(s) about identity and violence in terms of heterosexual and non-heterosexual identities, and religion’s role in it all.

It’s a long, thought-provoking post, and certainly made *me* think. As did the final post in this month’s Carnival, which I guess was partially inspired by Liz of “badgerbag: messy, surly, full of books” thinking about heteronormativity on that day. As the post’s title, “TMI for Blog Against Heteronormativity Day” might indicate, Liz wasn’t holding back. It’s easy to forget, in the spirit of concern and activism that underlies many of this month’s posts, that part of being GLBTQ is feeling free to express ourselves – to participate in the things that bring us joy and pleasure, in the company of those whom we choose. Liz shares with us some joyful memories from her past, including:

and I was super happy. I felt loved; I felt like a spectacle that was also a good example of fun-having and sexiness, i.e. a catalyst for other people to get things going instead of standing around like it was a cocktail party

Reading that post, and reflecting on the emotions Liz describes, really made me smile.

So, that’s it for this month’s Carnival. Please, I urge you – follow the links, go and read the posts I’ve summarised, *and the comments on those posts*. Leave your own comments on those posts – and if you’ve any bouquets or brickbats for *me*, in terms of how I’ve written *this* post, please, comment here! Next month’s Carnival will be hosted at 2sides2ron – please, submit posts for that edition using the submission form at Blog Carnival, and consider submitting posts by other bloggers (I was really pleased that there were submissions of posts by people other than the original authors this month). If you can’t want until next month, you can read the previous editions of this Carnival at daily dose of queer (and again), , Transcending Gender and jay sennett jaywalks. Enjoy! :-)

Last Wednesday, a New Hampshire judge, Merrimack County Superior Court Judge Kathleen McGuire, ruled that New Hampshire discriminated against two lesbian state employees and their families when the state denied them heath-care benefits and bereavement leave.

“The state’s attempt to couch the issue as one wherein all unmarried individuals are impacted equally, avoids . . . reality,” the judge wrote…

The ruling reversed a 2002 decision by the state Human Rights Commission involving Patricia Bedford of Concord and Anne Breen of Salisbury, both employees of state colleges and in relationships with long-term partners.

The State Employees Association has sought domestic-partner benefits for several years, and union President Gary Smith applauded the judge’s ruling, saying all state employees should be given health-care benefits.

Attorney General Kelly Ayotte will appeal this decision, according to her office.

The Concord Monitor featured an editorial on Judge McGuire’s ruling. Here’s part of it:

Merrimack County Superior Court Judge Kathleen McGuire made the right call when she ruled that the domestic partners of two lesbian state employees were entitled to health benefits. The state’s law on the matter is clear. It is illegal for employers of six or more people to deny benefits “on the basis of a person’s sexual orientation.”

McGuire didn’t buy the tortured logic of the state Human Rights Commission. The commission had rejected the women’s claims without a hearing, then refused to reopen the investigation. The women appealed, and in court, the commission argued that the women had no right to file a complaint, because they were challenging the constitutionality of the state’s marriage laws, not their denial of benefits. That was neither true nor relevant.

State rules governing employee contracts call for benefits to be provided to spouses and family members. The rules do not specifically bar the provision of benefits to domestic partners and are thus inclusive, not restrictive, McGuire said.

Read it all here.

Alan Lessik and John Manzon-Santosin are suing a California ice rink after being told that they could not hold hands while skating together.

Alan Lessik and John Manzon-Santosin sued in Alameda County Superior Court last month accusing the manager of Berkeley Iceland of unlawful and discriminatory business practices by denying them their right to skate as a pair.

The manager, Monte Tiedemann, twice told the pair to stop holding hands during their preparations for Gay Games VII at the Berkeley arena. The pair, who met at the Sydney Gay Games in 2002, said they have not encountered similar admonitions at two other Bay Area ice rinks.

Alan and John are asking in the suit that the rink’s manager undergo sensitivity training, and to receive an apology. Berkeley Iceland claims the two men were told to stop holding hands for safety reasons. A mediation meeting will take place on Tuesday.

In February, U.S. District Judge C. Lynwood Smith, Jr., issued an opinion on Williams v. King stating the outlawing of commercial distribution of sex toys in Alabama is constitutional.

The history of this case is highlighted in this snippet from Lesbian/Gay Law Notes:

It suffices to say that this case, which has been twice to the court of appeals after Judge Smith had declared the law unconstitutional in prior decisions, has generated four lengthy, searching decisions prior to this one, all attempting to cope with an area of constitutional law in the process of transformation. The 11th Circuit’s first decision in the case, issued in 2000, relied on Bowers v. Hardwick, the Supreme Court’s 1986 decision upholding Georgia’s felony sodomy law against constitutional attack, to hold that the sex toys law was not facially unconstitutional. At that time, the circuit remanded to Judge Smith to determine whether the law might be unconstitutional as applied. He determined that it was, but in its more recent decision, the 11th Circuit reversed again, asking Judge Smith to reconsider his ruling in light of Lawrence v. Texas, the 2003 Supreme Court decision that overruled Bowers and struck down the Texas Homosexual Conduct Law as violative of liberty under the Due Process Clause. As part of that decision, however, the 11th Circuit rejected the argument that Lawrence had recognized or created a fundamental right of sexual privacy for adults under the Due Process Clause.

Click here to read more about Judge Smith’s opinion in “Alabama Judge Finally Concludes That Sex Toys Ban Must Stand,” beginning on the ninth page of the April 2006 edition of the Notes.

New York Law School Professor Arthur Leonard, the editor and chief author of Lesbian/Gay Law Notes, also wrote about District Judge Lynwood Smith’s opinion at his blog Leonard Link in a post which begins, “It seems that legislators in some states feel that it is the business of the state to establish a ‘moral code’ for all of us by outlawing the promotion and sale of ‘sexual devices’ that people might use for solo pleasure…”

The Femme 2006 Conference program was announced this week. Get all the details at Femme2006.com.

The next Carnival of Bent Attractions will be hosted by Koan Bremner on May 10th. Submissions are due by midnight tonight!